That was a low blow, even for Jana.
I grind my back molar teeth together as I choose my next words carefully. If I’m not careful, I might say something that she could document and use in court as a bodily threat made to her person. That’s how furious I am.
“I think it’s time we change the way we communicate,” I tell her in the calmest voice I can muster.
“What do you mean by that?”
There was a time when Jana was pregnant that I suggested (and my lawyer implored) that we settle our financial and visitation arrangement with each other legally. Back then, we were still on good terms. Still friendly. And she insisted that we shouldn’t bother with legalities.
I don’t want the courts involved in our lives, Dak.
We can raise our child without government interference.
Like an idiot, I believed her.
What I didn’t understand was that it was actually to her benefit not to ask for an arrangement recognized by the courts. I didn’t realize it until about two years ago, but I’m participating in an unfair verbal agreement. I’ve been sending Jana way more money than the courts of New York City would have mandated me to, but I can only see Bella when it’s convenient for her. She is in full control. She’s had the upper hand this entire time.
I’ve been hesitant to challenge her on it because I didn’t want to start a war. A war that would no doubt leave casualties in its wake—primarily my daughter and maybe my parents, too.
But maybe I need to rethink that.
This isn’t working.
“I’ll call Bella tomorrow. Make sure you pick up when I call.”
Her eyes widen.
“What do you mean by changing the way we communicate, Dak?”
“You’ll find out soon enough. I’ll talk to you later, Jana.”
Then I disconnect the call.
Appointment reminder.
Monday, 10am with Katrina Banks.
Please respond with a Y or N to confirm your appointment.
After I receive my appointment reminder, I immediately text Katrina.
Me: Can we meet at the park for our next session?
Doc: Sure, I’ll bring Butters.
Me: I’ll bring breakfast:)
katrina
“So I was talkingto Bella’s mother,” Dak begins the conversation, leaning forward slightly. The two of us are facing each other, on our sides, on top of a Nighthawks blanket he brought along with two hot lattes and a few butter croissants.
While Dak was the one who suggested the park instead of the office, I find that keeping our sessions outside is the perfect way for him to unravel his thoughts plus it helps keeps his hands from wandering in between my legs. There’s something about my office that encourages him to do very x-rated things to me, not that I’ve complained.
“Did it go badly?”
“Yeah, you could say that. I almost lost my temper and said something I probably would have regretted. I’ve decided that something’s got to change between us, for Bella’s sake.”
“It’s difficult co-parenting,” I tell him based on my limited knowledge of the struggles of single parents. “But I can tell by the way you talk about Bella that you two love each other. You’ll figure it out. The first step is recognizing that you and her mother need to work together differently.”
