She couldn’t argue with that. “He was our first. And he was always so easy to be around.”
“Funny how time erases memories of sleepless nights and temper tantrums. I have a vivid memory of him throwing pasta at the wall on one occasion, but we’ll let that go.”
She smiled, remembering the same incident and thinking how easy it was to smudge out the past. “There were difficult moments, but that’s parenting. There are stages, and you move through them. Babyhood, the toddler years, teenage years—”
“Let’s not linger on that particular period in our family history.”
“There were plenty of slammed doors, that’s for sure, although more so with Rosie.” She rubbed her fingers across her forehead. “And then empty nest. I was dreading it. Whole articles are written about it. I remember that day we dropped him off at medical school and I was all prepared to be brave and fight back tears but he was so excited to be there, introducing himself to everyone else in his corridor, propping his door open and looking so happy as he anticipated everything that lay ahead, I didn’t feel like crying. How can you cry when your child is happy? It’s all a parent wants, isn’t it?” She leaned her head against his shoulder, the memories playing through her mind like a movie.
“Yes. We were relieved to see him settle so fast, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t difficult. As a parent your job is to let go, even when your instinct is to hold on.” He stroked his thumb across her palm. “I suppose no one really knows how each stage will affect them, and it depends a lot on what else is going on. We were busy. Preoccupied with our own lives.”
“So you’re saying this is another stage.”
“Well, isn’t it?” He lifted his hand and stroked her hair. “He’s still our child, even though he’s a man and has been for a longtime. And when a man says ‘this is the woman I want to share my life with’ that’s another stage. And it’s a big one. Someone else is the priority in his life. It requires everyone to step into a new role. It’s another change, and handling change is never easy. I used to see the impact of change all the time at work. People struggling with changes to their health, their family, their work. Parenthood, divorce, redundancy, menopause—the list is endless.”
And retirement, she thought. Some people struggled with that too, and Martin was one of them. But maybe it was easier to see things clearly when they weren’t happening to you.
And right now her focus was on Jamie.
“I feel guilty. If I was that good a mother, I’d have simply hugged him and offered congratulations.”
“Unless my memory is playing tricks, you did exactly that.”
“But it was a struggle. An act.”
“That part didn’t show. You said the right things, Jen. You did the right things. And if it’s going to take your insides a little while to catch up—well, no one needs to know.”
He was always so calm and logical. And insightful. Just talking it through with him made her feel better. It wasn’t hard to see why so many patients had been willing to wait weeks for an appointment with him rather than taking the first available slot with whoever happened to be free.
She kept her head against his shoulder and felt his arm tighten. “You’re wise.”
“It comes with age.” His tone was dry but she ignored that.
“It comes from spending years dealing with people. Understanding them. And from having good instincts.” She breathed. “I actually like Hayley.”
“Me too. She seems like a smart, sensible young woman. And she looked worried about Jamie’s big announcement. I have a strong suspicion she didn’t want to spring it on us.”
“I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable. I want her to know she’s welcome. Tomorrow I’m going to make that clear. Butright now—” She lifted her fingers to her forehead and rubbed. “My head is throbbing.”
“That’s the champagne. You don’t usually drink.”
“I think it’s the stress of keeping up an act.” And she was still worried they might have sensed her reaction. “Do you think they could tell I was shocked? I don’t want Jamie to think I disapprove of the relationship, because I don’t. And I wouldn’t hurt him for the world.” She hated the idea that she’d been anything less than fully supportive. That was the person she wanted to be, but this evening that ambition was being severely challenged.
“You were warm and welcoming. You spent ages looking at their photos.” His arm was still round her. “Stop worrying.”
“Rosie was quiet when they made their surprise announcement. Do you think something is wrong?”
“Was she quiet? She made a big fuss of them.”
“Yes, but after only after a pause. Initially she looked shocked and a bit horrified, I thought.”
“I was too busy gaping at Jamie to notice. She was probably taken by surprise, like the rest of us.”
“Maybe. Although you know what Rosie is like—she wears all her emotions on the outside so she’s not hard to read. Something felt off. From the moment she arrived home she has been very hyper. Excited.”
“That’s our Rosie. It’s Christmas,” Martin said. “She loves Christmas.”
“It felt as if she was trying a little too hard. And Declan barely said a word. Did you notice that?”
