“I hate to think of you on your own.” Rosie’s vision was blurred and she touched her sister’s arm. “I can’t bear it.”
“I wasn’t on my own.”
Rosie brushed tears away. “You weren’t?”
“Will was there,” Becky muttered. “He followed me. He saw how upset I was. Which, obviously, was a very uncomfortable moment. Because when you’re feeling feelings, the last thing you need is someone else seeing you feeling feelings.”
“Did he know why you were upset?”
“Yes, I told him. Unfortunately. Yet another humiliation to deal with. I told him everything, how seeing you getting married was killing me and how I thought I might be in love with Declan because seeing him marrying you made me feel so ill. And I was mortified by the whole thing. I hated myself for feeling that way.”
“And what did Will say?”
“He mostly listened. You know Will—he’s good at that. And he gave me a hug and helped wipe mascara off my face. And he said something that at the time I dismissed—” Becky frowned, remembering. “He said ‘are you sure this is about Declan?’ And I asked him what he meant, and he said that it must be hard seeing your twin sister getting married. And I said, well yes,of course it was, but it was because of Declan. My feelings for him were like a huge wedge between us.”
Rosie listened, ignoring the cold air and the shimmer of light on the surface of the snow. “This is why you stayed away from me. From us.”
“Yes, although that was a crazy thing to do because I missed you so much.”
“And why you changed your job?”
“Yes. Also crazy. I hate my new job.”
Rosie thought about it, the pieces gradually falling into place. “Why didn’t you talk to me about all this? Instead of staying away, why didn’t you talk to me?”
“Because the wordsby the way, I think I might love your husbanddon’t make for an easy conversation starter?”
“And you don’t love him? You’re sure?”
“Never been more sure of anything.”
Rosie groaned and pulled her into a hug. “I’m so relieved. So unbelievably relieved.”
“Well, obviously.” Becky patted her shoulder, her voice rough. “We’re close, but being in love with the same man would definitely cross a line. Although just for the record, even if I did love him, I’d never do anything to stand in the way of your happiness.”
Rosie pulled away, thinking for the millionth time how much she’d missed her sister. “That’s not why I’m relieved. I’m relieved because for a brief but horrible moment when you walked through the door yesterday and you and Declan were laughing together, I really was afraid that I’d inadvertently got in the way ofyourhappiness.”
“No. Never thought of him that way until the day of your wedding. We were just great friends, that’s all. And as for what happened at the wedding—Will was right. It was never about Declan. It was about watching you get married. I felt as if I was losing you, and it was crushing. I hadn’t expected it to affectme that way and I couldn’t decipher my own feelings. I love you more than anyone, so how could I begrudge you the happiness I saw on your face that day? What sort of person does that make me?”
“The sort of person who is lucky enough to have a twin sister.”
Becky brushed flakes of snow from Rosie’s coat. “You have some explaining to do too. Yesterday when you blurted out that I was in love with him—did you really think that?”
Rosie stared across the sea, watching the waves foam as the wind caught the surface of the water. “Not really, but I’d managed to convince myself you were better suited to him than I was.”
“Why? Why would you think that?”
“Because you and he have so much in common. Whereas he and I are really different.”
Becky looked at her. “Different isn’t a problem. You and I are different, and it has never been a problem for us.”
“That’s true. But youhaveto love me. I’m your twin. It’s compulsory.”
Becky grinned. “Not true. I don’t have to love you, I just do. Because you’re brilliant in every way. I’ve always been your biggest supporter.”
Rosie felt the familiar stab of insecurity. “I sometimes wish I was more like you, that’s all.”
Becky stared at her. “Why would you want to be more like me? I’m not comfortable talking about my emotions. I’m terrible with people I don’t know, but you walk into a room and light it up.”
