Her sister rolled her eyes. “You’ve told me that like a hundred times already. I told the caterer not to include any nuts in whatever she’s bringing over.”
Kaiya chewed the inside of her cheek. “I know that, but one can never be too careful.”
Kalilah sighed. “If you don’t have anything to do, why don’t you go and check up on the kids and make sure they’re behaving themselves with the clowns I invited?”
Kaiya giggled. “What are you afraid of, Lah? That your kids have taken after me by kicking every clown they see?”
Her sister laughed with gusto. A big smile was plastered across Kaiya’s face as she walked away. It wasn’t that she hated clowns, but for some reason when they were kids, clowns freaked her out.
Kaiya strode across the yard that was beautifully decorated for the twins’ birthday party. There were various attractions for the kids. There were balloons to be popped, a piñata for later, several games and jumping castles, to name a few. Kalilah and Finn had gone out of their way to make their children’s birthday spectacular.
Kaiya’s eyes fell on Lili who was doing the hoopla hoop with some of the kids. Kaiya had braided her daughter’s hair before the party. It was still like a dream to her that she now had a daughter she could do such with. Lili had also tried to braid her mom’s hair but hadn’t gotten the hang of it yet. She now had her little best friend to shop with and wear matching outfits with. Kaiya felt blessed.
Her daughter’s braids flew in the air as she swung around, laughing energetically. A fond smile was splashed across Kaiya’s face as she watched Max and Millie, who were dressed in baby blue, run toward their cousin and embrace her. Lili left the hoola hoop and tickled both of them, causing them to laugh heartily.
She reached where the clowns were entertaining the children with various balloon structures and laughed. At least, the children were held in rapt attention, and none of them looked like they were going to either kick or jump on the clowns anytime soon.
Kaiya crossed the yard again to inform her sister that everything was okay with the clowns, and she believed it would continue to stay that way. Her heart soared with joy as she heard the gay laughter of children all around her as they engaged in one fun activity or the other. Their parents were seated at a corner of the yard, also enjoying themselves with barbecue which Finn was handling.
Unable to stop herself, Kaiya went to the table where treats were kept and made sure one more time that there were no nuts in any of them. She caught Kalilah’s knowing look across the yard, and laughter fell from her throat. Her sister was bound to think she was paranoid. She didn’t care.
Kaiya returned to her sister and said with a twinkle in her eyes, “I’m pleased to inform you that the kids are behaving themselves.”
Kaiya turned in the direction of her child and saw Jalissa at a distance inflating balloons for some kids. The wistful look on her face made Kaiya wonder for the umpteenth time why Jalissa continually denied ever wanting children. Whenever her best friend was around kids, there was always this look in her eyes that showed how much yearned for one of her own.
“I’ll be right back,” she informed her sister briskly and walked to where her friend just finished helping the last child with a balloon.
“Thanks, Missy,” the boy said with obvious joy on his face.
Ruffling his brown hair, Jalissa replied with a broad smile of her own, “You’re welcome, sport.”
“You know,” Kaiya began as she stood beside her friend at the balloon stand, “you can always join the mommy club.”
Jalissa’s face instantly became pale like every other time Kaiya mentioned babies to her.
“What are you talking about?” Jalissa prevaricated, picking up a balloon.
Kaiya folded her arms across her chest and regarded her friend squarely. “You’d make such a good mom.”
Avoiding her gaze, her best friend replied, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Kaiya wondered why the topic of children always got her friend upset.
She placed a comforting hand on her friend’s shoulder. “What is it about having kids that always gets you upset, Lissa?”
With her face becoming pale, Jalissa turned away. “Please stop seeing something that isn’t there, Kai. Your sister assigned me to also check on the gifts for the kids. So, I’ll be right back.”
Kaiya watched ruefully as her friend walked hurriedly away from her. Kaiya was tempted to go after her, but from times past, she knew it wouldn’t get her anywhere. Her friend would only end up avoiding her like a plague which she didn’t like.
Perhaps when Jalissa was good and ready, she would talk. Kaiya made up her mind not to pressure her friend into saying why she got all emotional whenever they talked about children. It wasn’t fair on her friend. After all, Jalissa hadn’t pressured her into talking about the death of her supposed son. She just stood there beside her, offering her shoulder for her to lean on.
On her way back to where her sister was standing by a table filled with snacks for the children, Kaiya’s gaze moved to where the adults were hanging out, and her steps faltered. Her heart squeezed in her chest as she watched Tyler carefully carry her baby nephew. She swallowed thickly, but the lump refused to leave. Her eyes watered as she watched him cuddle the baby and smile at him.
This was most likely the way he had carried and cradled Lili when she was a baby, thinking she abandoned them. She never got to cradle her daughter. Never felt the infant against her chest, nursing at her breasts. Her father had taken that away from her.
Quickly, Kaiya sniffed back the tears threatening to spill down her face. This was a joyous occasion, and there was no place for tears, even though her heart was wrenching in pain at what she had lost. Although she had the love of her daughter, it still hurt that she had missed so much in her daughter’s.
For many years, she had thought she would never have another child; dedicated to giving her love to her son and afraid that she might lose another child just the way she lost the first one. However, now that she saw the wonderful sight of Tyler handling a baby, she ached for another child; a child that she would be able to be part of his or her life from the beginning. Unconsciously, her hand went to her flat stomach. Her mind ran wild, imagining Tyler’s second child nestled there. How wonderful the experience would be this time, unlike last time when she had been so afraid and filled with anxiety.
