“Still in pain,” I said.
“Will a hot bath help?” he asked. He really looked concerned, and I felt bad for not helping him at all with the kids. I was still mad, but he seemed to have cooled off with some remorse setting in.
“Worth a shot,” I said.
“I’ll go run it,” Jack said, stroking my cheek before getting up.
Once the bath filled, Jack brought my cane and walked me into the bathroom. He helped peel off my clothes, wincing as I flinched from the pain of my clothes against my skin.
“Poor thing,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
“It is kind of your fault,” I said.
“How?” he asked, looking horrified.
I dipped a toe into the water, the perfect almost-too-hot temperature. Jack held my hands as I settled in, then sat on the floor next to the tub. “Since I have so much pain, sometimeswhen I get stressed, my brain misinterprets the signals and puts pain everywhere.”
Jack sighed, casting his eyes down. “And I stressed you out.”
“Yep,” I said, lifting my hair to drape over the edge of the tub. Sweet relief poured into my muscles as the warmth enveloped me. I peeked my eyes open to find Jack watching me.
“I’m sorry I hurt you.”
I puffed out some air. “Sorry for loving you? My mistake, truly.”
I was being flippant, but that was kind of how I felt.
“Can I get in with you?” he asked.
“Sure. But no big expectations.”
“Nah,” he said with a little laugh. “I just want to be with you.” Jack removed his clothes and got in, scooting me up so he could get behind me. He arranged his legs on either side of me and leaned me back against his chest. We both hummed, the feeling so pleasant. “Sorry, got your hair wet.”
I shot a smile over my shoulder. “Guess you’ll have to wash it, then.”
With soft hands, he worked on slowly getting my hair wet, a rhythmic motion. He smoothed over the space behind my ear and down my neck, a soothing touch that had me melting.
“Sydney would have been mad I got her hair wet,” he finally said.
I nodded, not turning to look at him. Sometimes, I noticed he needed to not be distracted by eye contact, so the bath with us facing the same direction worked for us. “I mean, I don’t like interrupting my hair washing schedule,” I said. “But I’ve got bigger problems now.”
“I know,” Jack said. He got a pump of shampoo in his hand and started working it into my hair. His fingertips massaged my scalp and I sighed, nestling back into him harder. “She was really hard on me. And not like you are. She started out so wildlyaffectionate, doing anything and everything to make me happy. I’d never had anybody pay me that kind of attention. She was just . . . always there. When I needed her. When I didn’t need her. She convinced me I needed her, made herself my everything so I couldn’t picture a life without her. I loved the attention because . . . I never really had that.”
“Love bombing,” I said quietly.
“It’s funny, Rome’s wife called it that too. I never bothered to look up what it meant and assumed it was a good thing and just meant she loved me so much.”
“Oh, no.”
Jack sighed. “Yep. So when she started getting controlling, I went with it. I let her dictate everything.” He cupped water in his hands and poured it over my hair. “And she was just so cruel. She also gave me shit for wanting her to take control. Told me a real man wouldn’t be a little bitch.”
I stroked my fingers over Jack’s muscled thighs, wanting to reassure him without interrupting him.
“But if I didn’t go along with something, the crying and manipulation started.”
“Love never came without strings.”
“I guess,” he said softly, seeming like he’d never thought of it himself.
