Days were long and filled with salty, sandy fun. I had that sundrunk, heavy feeling at the end of every day, when we settled into long games of Phase 10 and Apples to Apples. Halfway through the week, though, there was what I internally refer to as The Incident.
We were all out playing in the water, and Guy and Annie got a little too cozy for my liking. I knew Annie liked Frank. It was a fact I knew well, as she often recounted to me how much of a hottie my own flesh and blood was. She’d never shown even a passing interest in Guy, but I knew just how easy it was to fall for him. I certainly had.
Did I mention that Annie was a bit of a knock-out? She had full C cups to my can-fill-out-a-B-cup-on-my-period boobs. While I was that kind of gangly teenaged thin, she resembled an Olympic athlete. And, as fifteen-year-olds often are, she was in a cute little bikini. I was, too, but the effect was entirely different. I know that when we compare ourselves, the patriarchy wins, but I’m only human. The facts were the facts. Annie was a smokeshow.
The Incident started with innocent splashing between Guy and Annie. Then Guy wrapped his arms around Annie and threw her. Then he picked her up like a freaking bride and sent her squealing into the surf, but not before using his cut, hockey-puck-shooting arms to lift her Olympic athlete stomach to his mouth for one of those raspberry tickles you do on little kids.
Guy put his mouth on Annie’s stomach, in front of me. In front of my whole family. Frank looked the other way, and I focused on bodysurfing away from the scene so no one could see my face.
I was livid. I was upset with Annie, though in fairness, I’d neveradmitted to her that I still liked Guy. She thought I was forever mad at him from the closet kiss. But I was also upset with Guy. I hadn’t given him permission to go touchingmyfriend. And he was the one spilling his feelings in that closet, not me.
But those were just the lies I told myself. I was most upset because I wished it was me.
I busied myself with reading my book on the shore, claiming I was tired of being wet. Guy and Frank took up a game of catch on the beach. Annie knew I was pissed.
“You good?” She sounded genuinely concerned rather than confrontational.
“I think I’m just about to get my period,” I lied. Annie knew I had tidal wave-aggressive periods and all the baggage that comes with them.
“Ugh. The worst,” she said sympathetically. Then, like the really good friend she was, she added, “I’ve got some M&Ms in my suitcase.”
“Hey, Kitty Cat!” Guy called as he came back over to our towel and umbrella home base. Little rivulets of water ran down his chest from his hair, making me both swoony and mopey. How dare he be attractive after what he did? “Wanna go look for seashells?”
I was lying on my stomach reading a book. Trying to show that selfish prick what he was missing, I squished whatever boob meat I had together as I looked up to respond. “No thanks. I’m kinda tired.”
Guy puffed out his bottom lip. “I saw some kid with a really big one, though. You won’t help me?” He cocked his head to the side. Why was he trying to be so playful with me?
“His parents probably bought it at a store and planted it,” I said dismissively. “Take Frank.”
Then Guy was shuffling next to me, moving the umbrella so I was in the shade.
“What are you doing?” I grumped at him.
“You’re turning red. You’ll burn when you nap.” He put my bookmark in my book and closed it for me. “You’ll look for shells with me tomorrow, yeah? Please?”
His brown eyes watched me with a puppyish optimism, like he’d laid a toy in front of me and was wagging his tail for me to throw it. I was still mad at him, but as usual, his cuteness won out.
“Fine,” I huffed.
When Annie and I had showered and were getting ready for dinner, she sat on the edge of her twin bed, combing her wet hair. She eyed me nervously.
“You like Guy.” My throat went dry.
“What are you talking about? He’s like a brother to me,” I managed.
“Kitty.” Annie’s freckles really stood out from her sun-stained face. “You can be real with me.”
I couldn’t say anything. I just nodded. My secret was out.
“Look, I got carried away with him today when I knew better. You’re more important than him. I don’t even really like him,” Annie admitted, eyes trained on her cuticles. “But you do. You should be out there playing with him, too.”
“I don’t know if you recall, but we’ve kissed before and he famously shoved me off of him. He doesn’t want me,” I said miserably.
Annie rolled her eyes. “That was all because of Frank. And because your families are intertwined and he doesn’t want to mess that up.”
“You think?” I asked.
“Yes, I’m sure.”
