She leads me into the venue area of The Knotted Barn, and my breath catches.
Zander’s standing in the middle of the room with his hands shoved in his pockets, his shoulders up to his ears. He looks up, his gaze slowly finding mine.
Scarlett’s arm slips from mine. “Surprise,” she whispers, then leaves and shuts the big barn doors, leaving Zander and me alone.
My throat tightens, and I try to put on a brave face, as though I haven’t been crumbling since my departure from his life. “What are you doing here?”
He steps closer, his boots scraping against the wood floor. “I screwed up.” His voice cracks. “I screwed up because I don’t want to lose you.”
I cross my arms as though I’m going to fight him on getting back together. But my mom’s words come back to me, and I soften my stance. “Go on.”
He drags a hand over his jaw. He looks like shit. I mean, he’s still gorgeous, but he looks… like I feel.
“That night I pointed to you in the crowd, you drew my attention. And not just because you’re gorgeous, but it was your smile. I told myself the next day, that would be it. That I would forget you. Then I asked Beau to fly you out, and I extended the time you were supposed to stay. The third time, I didn’t want you to leave at all. But you were so kind and sweet, and I didn’t want to hurt you. So, I told DeSoto to deny you backstage entry even though it was the opposite of what I really wanted. That’s the night I wrote the single.”
“Are you saying…” I had suspected that maybe… but he’d never mentioned it to me.
“I wanted to wait until it was done to tell you. But I wrote that single about me becoming the man you deserve. Beau heard me playing it one night and said I had to record it. I didn’t think you’d ever find out, or maybe you’d hear it at some point and wonder, but you’d never really know.”
Tears flow down my cheeks. “Zan.”
He toes his boot on the floor for a second, staring at it before he looks back at me. “Then I came here, and you knocked me over, Romy. Not just because you were pregnant, but because of who you are. After I finally decided to give this a chance, it was better than I could have imagined. I never thought my life could be like this. Your family, the ranch, all of it… it’s not anything I’ve ever had or dared to dream of having. So, I was scared. Not of you. Not even of these feelings I have for you. I was scared of what would happen when you saw what my life is really like. I thought if I kept you hidden and I kept you safe, I could protect you. That you wouldn’t see the bad parts of being with me, and you wouldn’t be hurt by everyone on the outside. And then maybe…” He swallows. I watch his Adam’s apple bob. “Then maybe you wouldn’t leave me.”
His confession slices through me. “But you don’t get to decide that for me, Zander.”
“I know. Believe me, I know.” His shoulders sag.
“You can’t keep me locked away, and you can’t protect me from everything in this world. You think I don’t know what it means to be in this life with you? I do. I understand the ugly parts. The messy parts. But I want to be in it with you. Together. As long as it’s the two of us against the world, that’s all that matters to me.”
For a moment, he says nothing. Silence hums between us. Then he’s closing the gap.
“You really mean that?” he asks with tears in his eyes.
“Yes. I wouldn’t be standing here if I didn’t.”
He reaches for me, his fingers grazing mine tentatively, as if he doesn’t know if I’ll accept his apology. I give him an opening, locking my pointer finger with his. He takes my olive branch, tightening our hold and pulling me forward, his forehead resting on mine.
I breathe him in.
I missed him so much.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “God, Romy, I’m so damn sorry. I was so afraid of the outside world ruining us that I did it for them.”
“No more hiding. We’re in this together. It’s the two of us. Do you hear me?”
He nods against my forehead. “Yeah. I hear you.”
“You cannot run away from me anymore. You cannot push me away anymore, understand?”
“Never again. And I’m changing up my schedule. I’m going to take some time off and slow down. And when I leave this ranch, I want you with me. And not to sit in a hotel room. I want to show you and our son the world, but we’ll limit the time we tour. We’ll do everything by consensus, and if it doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t work for me.”
The we sounds like heaven.
His hand leaves mine, and he cradles my head. “Will you take me back?”
I nod, and he presses his lips to mine. All our fear and longing and love crashes between us.
The door creaks open behind us, and a flicker of light seeps in from outside.
