“Why are you telling me this right now?” I press my hand to my stomach, forcing myself to remain calm.
“Because I couldn’t keep fake dating you with you thinking it has always been pretend. You honestly think that everything between us has been for show? If that were the case, I wouldn’t be here, wanting you, kissing you. We wouldn’t have done what we did in the elevator on our first date, or anywhere else after for that matter.” He gestures around the room. “There’s no one here. No cameras. Just us.”
Tears swell behind my eyes. I refuse to let them spill, instead keeping them at bay by chewing on the inside of me cheek until it hurts. “I can’t.”
“It’s okay, Wallflower.” He presses his hand to my face, his thumb rests just below my eye, and his fingers thread through my disheveled hair. “You don’t have to say anything right now. I don’t know what happened to you to believe love only exists in romance novels, but I’m patient. I trust you’ll tell me at some point. I just couldn’t go another day without you knowing how I feel about you. Especially after today. Even if me telling you this only makes you want to run in the opposite direction or endwhatever this is what we’re doing. I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give me at this point.”
I allow his words to sink in. I feel what I want to say inside of me, resting at the tip of my tongue, but I won’t let those words out. They fill my mouth, both bitter and sweet.
“I don’t want to end whatever this is, but I can’t make you any promises, Holt.” I blink the tears away and slip my hand under the coat of his suit, pressing my palm to his firm chest.
“I understand. But, when you’re ready, I’ll make sure you know exactly how deeply I’ve fallen for you, Wallflower. It’s a promise.”
I give him a small smile and rise to stand on my toes. His words sink in, hitting me in all the right places. Again, it’s terrifying, but I’m grateful for Holt’s honesty. It’s difficult for someone like me to admit even the slightest bit of love I feel for him is real. I may not be able to tell Holt I’m falling for him, but I take the moment to tell him I don’t want this to end in my own way when I press my lips to his quickly before pulling back to take in his face. I stare into his blue eyes and realize that, aside from his confession, there’s something else weighing on his mind.
“What happened today?” I ask, holding onto his hand. “How did it go visiting your mother’s grave?”
“Honestly?” He sighs, pulling back for the first time since he’s been here. “It was a shitshow.”
He spins around and shoves his hair back, but it slowly falls back over his eyes when he turns back to face me with his hands on his hips.
“What happened? Did your dad say something to you?” I think back to what he said about the contention between them over his mother’s true killer. I hate knowing there’s a wedge between them over this. I wish Holt’s father would hear him out.
“My dad.” Holt wafts his hand through the air. “Julianna.”
“Julianna?” I ask, stepping forward. “Are you two okay?”
“We talked about the lawsuit from Rome.”
I stop. “Oh.”
My stomach twists with anxiety at the look on his face. The heartache there that can only have come from one thing...
“She told me something,” he says solemnly.
“What… what did she say?”
“That she was the one who wrote the article about Rome.” He holds my gaze. “She was the one who submitted it to my magazine.”
It feels like the air has been sucked out of me. I freeze, unable to think of a single thing to say or do. Keeping Julianna’s secret is one thing, but knowing Holt knows the truth now is another.
Relief washes over me because I’m thankful Julianna finally told her brother the truth. I didn’t realize until now the weight of carrying a secret this big inside me.
Guilt slams into me like a gut punch.
Lost for what to stay, I simply stand in the hallway staring at Holt, when his expression shifts. His jaw hardens and his hand flexes at his side. “You already knew, didn’t you?”
His question breaks something inside of me. Something that must show on my face as he takes me in, his brows creasing together with hurt. Hurt I've caused by keeping a secret that wasn't mine to share from him.
“Don’t bother lying, Wallflower.” He inches closer. “You already did that thing with your lip.”
I suck in a sharp breath. Fuck. “Holt…”
“Tell me the truth. Did you know Julianna wrote the article in my magazine?”
I square my shoulders and grind my jaws, telling myself notto fall apart. That’s what you do when you’re in love. You let the other person affect you.
I won’t let that happen with Holt.
