Home shouldn’t mean heartache or betrayal.
And yet, the drive into Willow Ridge felt like returning to a place I fit so well into.
I follow Mom and her husband into Sterling Ranch with a sigh, a familiar anxiety swelling within me. It’s strange being here. The last time I’d stepped foot on the ranch, it’d been to say goodbye. To tell Casper Sterling I had no intention of ever coming back.
It looks bigger than the last time I was here. Not just because of the beautiful wedding venue going up on one side of the ranch, beneath the gaze of the mountain. And not because there are more buildings scattered across the land. There’s just an air about the place that makes it feel so much larger than it was before.
Pulling my rental car into the lot by Mom’s little sedan, I take a moment to breathe it all in. When I first came back, I had to take a moment to smell the fresh mountain air. I’ve been so used to busy cities like Los Angeles, New York, and Paris, that this kind of air feels different now.
Part of me feels like I don’t belong here anymore. Like I’m separate to this place I grew up in.
And yet, another part of me feels like this is it. Like I’ve found the missing puzzle piece.
I don’t know whether it’s because of the town itself or finally being back at Sterling Ranch.
Mom steps out of her car first, followed by her husband. He’s not a bad man, but I can tell Mom is doing everything she can to keep him—even if that means pushing me away. His daughter comes first to him, and that means she has to come first to Mom, too.
Stella and her new fiancé get out of their car; she’s all big smiles and giggles when she grabs his arm. I don’t know if I should feel weird about being here, intruding on this. It feels like a family thing, and for the longest time, these people have shown me I’m not family to them.
And yet, here I am. Getting out of my rental, always the outsider in their lives.
Though, I can admit, seeing the venue up close, I understand why Stella wants to get married here.
Is it strange she wants to get married on the ranch of her ex-boyfriend from high school? Sure. She could have picked the Wiley Estate, which has a more regal air about it, rather than the rustic one Sterling Ranch offers. Wiley would have been more her style, anyway. So, it makes me wonder if she’s here for more than just the views.
The thought makes my stomach turn. I grab my purse as I step out of the vehicle completely, camera tucked inside. I don’tphotograph scenery or weddings; I’m a fashion photographer. I take photos of models who look nothing like me and pretend I can exist in their world the way I am. It’s only because I’m good at what I do that I’m not totally mocked by my peers.
Stella grins when her eyes swing to me. There’s a familiar glint of cruelness in them. Even after a decade, she’s still the same high school bully I tried so desperately to escape.
“Isn’t it gorgeous?” Stella asks, huddling close to her fiancé. Brad is about as dull as a paper plate. But he has money, that much I know. A condo in L.A, if Mom’s phone calls can be believed. And he’s promising her a honeymoon to Bora Bora, so at least he has taste.
I swallow hard, nodding. “Yeah, they’ve made this place amazing.”
Stella makes a pleased sound in the back of her throat as Foster Sterling appears with a woman on his arm. He looks older than the last time I saw him. But most of all: happy.
The woman greets Stella first with a wide smile. “Hi there, I’m Lucy Hunt, the wedding planner here! How are you?”
The conversation turns to gushing, talking numbers, and a whole lot of nothing I need to worry myself with. Chances are, I won’t even be here for the wedding. I’m praying for a shoot in Milan or booking a cruise through Greece. Anything but here.
My gaze strays to the other side of the ranch, where the stables and barn sit. I remember spending one too many afternoons in the loft of the barn before it was converted into a bunk house for the twins and ranch hands, wondering what life would be like on Sterling Ranch.
I used to dream of marrying Casper here. Silly as it was, I really thought I had a chance. He was my best friend, treated me like I wasn’t just some fat girl easily replaceable in my own family. He used to treat me like I actually existed.
Maybe that’s why I liked to imagine a life with him. A future. Because he treated me like I was human, and not a disappointment.
I sigh, looking away. I only catch the end of the conversation, Mom’s words making my hackles rise. “Hattie could photograph the wedding! Save on costs there.”
Oh, no. Absolutely not. “I’m not a wedding photographer,” I say, my words silencing the group. Stella’s eyes burn with anger, Mom is disappointed I won’t drop everything for her favourite, the groom looks perpetually confused, and Mom’s husband rolls his eyes.
“A wedding photographer has an entirely different skill set,” I continue. “I work high fashion. Photoshoots and runway. Plus, I don’t even know if I’ll be in the country during the wedding. You haven’t even asked.”
Mom looks like I’ve slapped her. “Can’t you just do one thing for your sister?”
I can’t help but roll my eyes. I might have caved coming here—which might be the biggest mistake of my life—but I’ve also got a shiny new backbone. Ten years away gave me a chance to grow and even heal a little.
“If she wants good photos, an actual wedding photographer team is what she needs. I don’t have the set up for a wedding, either. What about a videographer? Because I certainly can’t do that. Be realistic, Mom.”
Before my mother can answer, the wedding planner steps in. “We actually have a great contract with a photographer in town! She and her sister are a team who work both angles, video can be included. I have their portfolio in my office.”
