Maybe it’s a dick move, sticking around in the hopes that she’ll be here with my ex. But I know better. Hattie Simms likely won’t be anywhere near her dreadful stepsister.
I release a breath, waving Finch off. He doesn’t say anything as he goes to leave, but he does pause in the doorway to the office like he wants to say something.
I don’t look up from the logbook. And eventually, he leaves without saying whatever it was that was on his mind.
Calder being away more should have meant more peace for me. Less being questioned, more work getting done. I love my twin, and he’s good at what he does, but him taking a chance and moving in with his girl really changed things here. But instead of getting the peace I need, I have three ranch hands and trainers filling in for Calder in thepiss-Casper-offdepartment.
I slam the logbook shut and lean back in my office chair, eyes closing.
In the darkness of my own thoughts, I see her. Not as she was the day we graduated, wearing her pink floral dress and graduation cap.
I see the Hattie Simms who was featured as one of the top photographers to watch out for. It was a magazine article Ma found and gave to me. There’d been an interview with Hattie, a photo of her now. She’d dyed her hair almost black, looking nearly unrecognisable now that she’s grown. But she still has the same beautiful eyes, the same soft smile.
Opening my eyes, I reach for the bottom drawer of the desk where I keep the article. The page is crumpled and worn. It’s at least a year old now. She’d mentioned nothing about her time in Willow Ridge, and I understand why.
She has nothing left for her here. Not her mother, who picked her stepdaughter over her own child. Not friends, because most left when we graduated—or betrayed her, like I did.
I shake my head, drop the article, and slam the drawer shut. I should’ve just taken the damned job. Anything would be better than sitting here and wishing I could change the past.
When the old computer finally boots up, I get the details for the pick up and make sure Finch and Colby have everything they need before going back to the stables. One of the new mares we’ve rescued makes her way to the stable door, nudging her head in my direction.
“Y’all are so much easier than feelings,” I mutter, scratching the top of her head. From here, I notice her ribs aren’t as prominent, which means she’s finally putting on weight. Good. She has good temperament, and once she’s back in shape, I want her going somewhere good.
The kids named her Fern, which she seems inclined to answer to now. The old girl nickers, butting her nose into my arm.
“Yeah, you’re right.” I shake my head, pulling away. Slowly, I make my way to the stable entrance; Calder has one of the older stallions in the yard, another trainer not far spotting him in case he’s thrown off. Calder is pretty lucky he hasn’t been seriously injured by the wilder horses yet. But like Dad says, there’s always time. And Calder is someone likely to take risks.
When I turn from the yard, I notice three cars heading towards the wedding venue. From here, I can’t tell who it might be, but in my gut I already know.
Part of me wants—no,needs—to find out if Hattie is here. If she came home for Stella’s wedding, and if she’s on the ranch today.
The other part of me is pretty sure I should stay the hell away. That Hattie, who is successful and managed to get out from under the thumb of her mother, doesn’t want to see me—doesn’t want to be reminded of the worst year of her life.
I scrub a hand down my face, but I can’t make myself look away.
What would be the harm of scoping the venue out? I’d look like a jealous ex, for starters. Even though Stella and I only dated for six weeks, and I wouldn’t even say we were a couple, her fiancé doesn’t know that. He’ll probably see me as someone stuck in the past.
And he wouldn’t be wrong. But it’s a different past I’m trapped in. A past where I didn’t throw away the best girl I knew because of her wicked stepsister’s threats.
Not even Calder knows this. He still thinks I’m jaded from what happened with Stella, and I never cared to correct him. It didn’t matter, because Hattie wasn’t here.
I know I can’t lose my chance at seeing her again, even if it’s briefly.
Even if I look fucking crazy doing it.
With a sigh, I finally turn away from the venue and the cars pulling in. I’m too far away to make anything out anyway. The stable is quiet save for the horses moving within their stalls. I can imagine Finch and Colby in the bunks preparing to leave, going to the garage to grab the trucks and horse trailers. The others are probably coming back from their jobs, ready to do more for the day.
The ranch is busy, constantly moving, growing. And I feel stuck, locked in a place I can’t escape.
Trapped in a past that needs to be rectified, dreaming about a woman I’ll never have.
TWO
HATTIE
It’s strange being home.
For a long time, I refused to consider Willow Ridge my home. It was the place where my life fell apart, where I knew I could be so easily replaced. My mother found herself a new daughter, and the man I’d considered my best friend chose her over me.
