Zoe nodded. “Well, not ’til I’m eighty. I do have some hope for a life. But I have time, and I’m not going anywhere at present.” She paused. “And I know what it’s like to hurt so deep inside you think you’ll never get past it. But when you do, life is so much sweeter.”
Ava hugged her again. “Nowthat’sthe truth I wish everyone knew.”
* * *
Gavin felt like shit. He looked worse, and he hated that he’d broken down in front of Zoe. Hadn’t he hoped to have the strength to break it off with her? Now he didn’t have to. She’d probably never want to see his sorry ass again.Fuck.He hadn’t just cried, he’d fallen, wept, and snotted all over the place. And man, he was an ugly crier.
Hell.
He sat in Lee’s office, a week and two days after his meltdown. At his regularly appointed time. After he’d lost it Tuesday night, he’d slept for hours. Landon had eventually woken him the next day, only to pack his sorry ass home and shove him in bed. Then apparently he and the rest of the family had taken turns watching him while he slept. But not Zoe. She stayed away.
And that stabbed like a knife. Like a fucking KA-BAR through his spleen. He’d sayheart, but he wasn’t sure he had one anymore.
It was like his whole body ached. He had no energy, no desire to do anything but mope. He’d even slept through Independence Day, right through the fireworks last night. No worries about him losing it with those loud booms. Oo-fucking-rah.
But Landon had forced him to get up. Nagged and poked and prodded until Gavin had taken a weak swing at him. “God. I think our cousins hit harder than that,” Landon had mocked. “And I’m talking about Cam, the weakest link.”
“Dick.”
The rudeness had made Landon smile, so Gavin had given him a litany of better, more thorough insults.
“Gavin, good to see you,” Lee said.
Gavin sighed.
“Landon, I’d like you to stay.”
“Sure.”
So fat-ass sat right next to Gavin on the couch, thigh to thigh.
“Move over,” Gavin said.
“Make me.”
Gavin looked at Lee, then looked at Landon, as if to say, “You see what I put up with? Why I’m more nuts than usual?”
Lee didn’t hide a grin for once. “I have brothers too, Gavin. I get it.”
“Hey.” But Landon moved over.
“I know what happened. Or at least, I heard what happened from others. Why don’t you tell me?”
Gavin didn’t want to talk in front of Landon. Honestly, he was surprised Lee had suggested it. Then he realized he had nothing to lose. Zoe was gone. He had to live through this mess. Somehow.
So he told it, all of it, and broke down again when he talked about Mick’s kid. About Amanda’s wedding. About losing Zoe, the reality of that pain making it hard to breathe.
“Now, Gavin. Look at me.”
He glanced at Lee.
“How do you feel?”
“Feel? Like a train ran over me. It hurts.”
“Good.”
Psychotic bastard.
