That’s one way to put it.
“Is Zach being nicer to you? He's in a fuck ton trouble if he’s not.” Merci huffs between breaths, glaring at me as his sneakers slap the pavement.
“What?”
Merci rolls his eyes. “I like you, so I threatened him. It's called friendship, Ryan. Look it up.”
He says it like it’s simple, like I’m worth protecting just because he decided I was.
“Thanks.”
Eli’s chewing his lip as we jog. “Is it weird for you? Being married to a man?”
I glance at him. “Weird how?”
He stumbles, face turning red, then speeds up, like he can outrun the question.
Behind me, Merci lets out a dramatic “ugh.” “Do you even like men, or did Connor not give a shit? He probably didn’t even think about how fucked up it is to force someone straight into marrying him.”
“I’m bi. But no, he never asked.”
Merci pants out a laugh. “Wish Zach would let me accidentally back over Connor with my car. Just once. For science.”
“Jesus fuck. How violent are you?”
Eli giggles, glancing back at us. “You have no idea.”
“Surprised he even married you.” Merci huffs, slowing down a bit. “Connor’s so fucking uptight about his sexuality.”
Eli shakes his head, slowing down to keep pace with us. “Don’t make Connor sound homophobic.”
Merci shoots him a glare, sweat running down his temple. “Oh, because he doesn’t have some internalized issues going on? He can’t even handle getting his dick sucked by Raiyne. Looks like he’s about to murder someone every time it comes up.”
Eli’s cheeks blaze as he flicks me a quick, embarrassed glance.
Heat crawls up my neck, and I hate that it’s not from the run. “Rua? From the Serpents?”
“Yup.” Merci pops the ‘p’ like he always does.
My throat tightens. “W-what happened?”
“Fucking dickhead Raiyne helped those assholes kidnap me.” Merci goes quiet for a second. “I was working a sex party with him. I used to be a sex worker. One thing led to another, and Connor got a blowjob from Raiyne.”
“Oh.”
My heart hammers against my ribs. Last night . . . I thought it was his first time with a man.
But Rua? Our rival?
I'm so fucking stupid.
Tears well in my eyes.Five things I can see. The sidewalk. Eli's worried face. Rua—No. Fuck it. I pick up speed, pushing myself hard until my legs burn.
“Ryan, slow down!” Eli calls from behind.
But I can't. The image of Connor with Rua wedges itself into my brain like a splinter. So I run faster.
I wish I had my music, had Joan Jett in my ears telling me not to care what people think. Except I do care. I care about what Connor did.
