I was ready to wait, to help her heal. To be there when she was ready to open up and share her life with me.
Except it was never going to be that way.
She’s held me at arm’s length on purpose.
“Kid.”
“Little Boy.”
She never saw me as a man.
Just a toy.
Skidding to a stop, I jerk the wheel to park in the wide spot in the beginning of the long lane to the ranch.
Bouncing my forehead off the steering wheel doesn’t help ease the ache that clenches my chest so tightly it hurts to breathe.
How in the hell do I change the laws of time? Magically make myself old enough that she’d consider me?
Movement out of the corner of my eyes makes me look out the side to find Sophia scowling at me from her own car.
She motions me to roll my window down.
“What the heck is wrong with—” Her mouth freezes into a circle when she locks onto my face.
“Sawyer? Meet me at our spot.” Slamming on the gas, her little SUV fishtails on the ice before taking off.
I don’t know if I can handle this right now.
But I dutifully follow.
Sophia and I made a pact when Mom died, that no matter what, if one of us called for a meeting, we’d go without question.
I was the one who pushed the agreement. Except that was over grieving, not this.
Even if it feels an awful lot like a piece of me died.
Climbing the rickety stairs to the loft above the equipment shed, I’m not sure I’m up for any kind of interrogation.
“It’s been years since we’ve been up here, huh?” She flips on the switch of her old Disney Princess lamp to light up the room.
Shit, there’s still dusty toys strewn around where we left them. I’m surprised there aren’t critters living in here. It stays warm in the winter from the heaters downstairs.
“Yea, a few,” I grumble, stretching out on the worn wooden bench.
“Tell me. This is about Val, isn’t it? I mean, you’re supposed to be at work.” She tugs off her coat and sits in her rocking chair that looks like it’s about two sizes too small.
“Yea,” I groan. “I don’t really want to talk about it though.”
My heart is ripping in two.
How do I put that into words?
“What did she do? Want me to throat punch her? I mean, I bet she could totally kick my ass, but I can get in a lucky hit.” Sophia stares past me, her face pinches up as if Val was standing behind me.
The thought of my tiny ass sister trying to take Val on for me almost makes me smile.
But I let out a sigh instead. “She’s strict about being hands off during the week. No texts, nothin’. I thought she just needed time to learn to trust me, but I guess I was just the wrong guy.”
