“I wish I could swoon,” Penelope said.“Lying unconscious would be preferable to my current state.All this emotion is overwhelming.I have no control over it.It’s something that can only be experienced, not quantified.It’s terrifying.I don’t know what to do.”
“Because he’s a rake?”Gloria asked.
“Because he makes me feel like there’s more to life,” Penelope admitted.
Gloria cocked her head.“Like what?”
“Like… believing in love.”
“Believing?”Gloria lay a hand on Penelope’s arm.“Youarein love.”
Penelope’s stomach bottomed.Bloody hell.This was not the result she’d been looking for.
“That’s your hypothesis,” she stammered.
Gloria was undeterred.“Are you afraid he doesn’t feel the same about you?”
“I know he doesn’t.”
That was the part that hurt.Her perfume had worked.It made a man as amazing as him believe he was interested in her.
Unbeknownst to him, it wasn’t true.It was just science.Carefully constructed aromas designed to fool his brain.Chemistry.Alchemy.Manipulation.
And Penelope was the one who had fallen for it.
“Why don’t you tell him how you feel?”Gloria asked softly.
Penelope scoffed.“What would that do?”
Gloria pursed her lips.“You don’t believe in reformed rakes?”
“No,” Penelope answered bluntly.“Even if I did, I wouldn’t want to change him.That’s not what love is.”
Gloria arched her brows.“Now you’re an expert on love?”
Penelope was pretty sure she no longer considered herself an expert in anything.But if she found it objectionable for others to demand Nicholas give up his art, she could not ask him to forsake any other passions.Even the ones that made her want to cry.
“Doyoubelieve in reformed rakes?”she countered.
“He’ston,” Gloria admitted.“Isn’t keeping mistresses acceptable Society behavior, as long as it’s discreet?I am certain he wouldn’t flaunt his other lovers in front of you—”
“He wouldn’t have to.The caricaturists and the society papers flaunt all his indiscretions for him.I don’t want the image in my head at all.”Penelope rubbed her temples.“He’s leaving tomorrow.That is the best thing for both of us.”
Gloria crossed her arms.“What about love?”
“He’s not in love,” Penelope said in exasperation.“Once he is out of scent range, the effects of the perfume will wear off and he’ll forget me completely.Life will return to normal.”
“Hislife,” maybe,” Gloria said doubtfully.“What about yours?”
Penelope touched her fingertips to Gloria’s telescope stand.“You have the stars.I have science to keep me busy.I’ll be in my laboratory.”
With the door shut tight to ensure she be unable to hear anyone knock.If she saw Nicholas again, she would have to confess the truth about the trial.She could not continue living a lie.
Gloria hesitated.“You plan to lock yourself in your laboratory until he’s gone?”
“No,” Penelope said.“That would be an ineffectual half measure.”
She planned to cocoon herself in her laboratory for the rest of her life.
