She shifted. Just slightly. A slow, sleepy sort of nuzzle against my shoulder. Her breath warmed the fabric of my shirt. And then she went still.
Deadweight still.
My heart stuttered. Juniper… had fallen asleep on me.
I stared down at her, a little stunned. Her hair was a mess across her cheek, her hand curled into the hem of the hoodie like she was holding herself together even in her dreams.
And I —
I was done for.
God. I wassodone for.
I shifted carefully, enough to tuck the blanket a little higher around her, to let her head rest more comfortably on my chest. My free hand hovered uselessly in the air for a moment before settlingin her hair, barely brushing it. I prayed my racing heartbeat wouldn’t wake her.
She didn’t stir.
I couldn’t stop looking at her.
Like this, she looked nothing like the Juniper the world thought they knew — sharp, clever, self-possessed. The Juniper she tried so hard to put in front of everyone. Even me.
Here, in my arms, she looked soft. Young. Tired in a way I didn’t think had anything to do with the late hour. Like she hadn’t let herself rest in a long, long time.
My phone buzzed beside me — some email or push alert I didn’t care about — but it reminded me. Of the photo. The one she’d posted.
I pulled it up again. Just to look. Just to have proof that this had happened. That she’d let me close, even for a second.
I saved it to my phone..
The moment it landed in my messages, I tapped it twice. Made it my background — I didn’t even hesitate.
It was stupid. Dangerous.Fake.
But I didn’t care.
Because right now, she was asleep in my arms. Wearing my hoodie. Trusting me, just a little. And I wanted to remember this moment forever.
And all I could do was pray that this wouldn’t be the last time she let me hold her like this.
She didn’t wake up. We sat there forhours.
I scrolled through my phone for a few minutes, but I was worried that every swipe across my screen would wake her. I considered another movie, but the remote was on the coffee table in front of us, and I would have to move to grab that too.
So I just sat. Closed my eyes gently,listeningto her sleeping soundly against me. I might have dozed off too. Warm and home in the space between her heartbeat.
Even when I shifted beneath her, even when I gently —so gently— pulled my arm out from behind her shoulders. She mumbled something that didn’t sound like words and curled into the warm space I’d left behind.
I just stood there for a second, staring at her. Breathing like I’d run a marathon. I couldn’t leave her like that.
She’d wake up stiff and sore, probably annoyed, definitely embarrassed. And the last thing I wanted was to ruin this — whateverthiswas — by letting her feel like she’d overstepped.
So I bent down and whispered her name. “Juniper.”
Nothing.
“Hey. I’m gonna — I’m gonna move you, okay?”
Still nothing. Jesus. Outcold.
