Not to take anything away from her, because not only was Lacy brilliant, but she was also beautiful. Her caramel skin was always polished, and her smile could light up any room. Not only were her teeth as straight as they could be, but they were also white as hell. Her smile put those paid-for smiles to shame any day. She was fine as hell and thick in all the right places, so I understood why she had bruh about to lose his shit in front of these snobby ass people at this dinner party.
“No, Lacy. I’m sick of this shit.” Michael’s loud outburst was heard throughout the ballroom, and since these uppity ass people had little excitement in their lives, all eyes were trained on him. Lacy was trying to speak in quiet tones, but the moreshe tried to quiet Michael, the louder he raised his voice. I knew a man who was fed up when I saw one, and Michael was clearly fed up.
Doing the opposite of what everyone else was doing, I walked to the bar to get another drink since the waiter who’d been feeding me drinks all night was also caught up in my fiancée’s drama. Thankfully, the bartender was ready to take my order as soon as I made it over. “Let me get a crown and Coke.”
“Um, actually, hold that order,” my father said, walking up at almost the same time. Once the bartender left to tend to other patrons, he turned his attention to me. “Shouldn’t you be tending to your woman, son?”
“We both know that ain’t my fucking woman.”
“Well, in less than a month, you two will be married, and what will be your excuse then?”
“I’ll decide after I say I do,” I answered my father, my back already to him as I walked off. Our relationship hadn’t always been so strained, but I couldn’t respect a man who allowed money to make important decisions for him. That shit may have been cool when it came to his life, but not mine.
My plan for tonight was to mind my business, but as soon as I sat back down at the table, I felt my mother’s eyes on me. She was nudging me to go and check on Lacy with her eyes. I’d always been able to sense her disapproval, and like any man, I never wanted to disappoint my mother. I’d made a promise, and since Lacy was hellbent on seeing this thing through, I had no choice but to play my part. This would be the last thing they could ever hold over my head, so once I walked down that aisle, I would cut all ties with this entire world.
What Lacy and her dude had going on had absolutely nothing to do with me, but in my mother’s eyes and everyone else’s, Lacy was my soon-to-be wife. That alone was what made me get up out of my seat when the disagreement got louder. It was myjob to protect her from whatever she had going on with her real man.
I moved at a quick pace until I was within speaking distance. Once I got the conversation calm, they were free to continue, but they were causing too much attention, and attention would do nothing but make mothafuckas start asking questions none of us were ready to answer. This wasn’t the time or place.
“Maybe we should take this outside.” I stepped up and placed one hand on each of their shoulders. I could feel the relief in Lacy’s demeanor, but not Michael’s. I only wanted to end the show they were putting on in front of our whole engagement party, but I could tell it was about to get worse.
“We’re not taking anything outside. If I walk outside with you, I’m going to put you on your ass.” Michael’s declaration took me by surprise because we both knew that was a lie. I didn’t know if he had other niggas in the streets scared of him, but I knew for sure there was no way he could beat me.
There was nothing or no one I had to be afraid of, especially not some nigga who would let his girl agree to marry another man. It wasn’t my place to tell Lacy she deserved more, but if she were my real girl, there was no way I would let her parents convince her to marry someone else. The only thing I could see that would allow a man to do something like that was if he really didn’t care about her at all.
There would be nothing standing between the woman that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and me. So, while Michael was standing there, making a scene, it was clear he wasn’t ready to risk it all for her. From what I had heard from Lacy, Michael needed the money that her parents were giving her for this wedding just as much as she did, which meant neither of them wanted to get cut off.
I’d been making my own money since I was sixteen, so there was no way I was letting another grown man tell me what I wasand wasn’t going to do. I never cared about the trust fund my parents had set up for me, and I rarely accepted money from them. I didn’t spend a lot of money, which meant my pay from the Army was enough for me to live a modest lifestyle. Lacy was the complete opposite, and her parents had been spoiling her like a princess since the day she was born. Michael clearly wanted a piece of that.
“I see you upset, so I’m going to let you have that one. But let’s be clear. That’s the only pass you getting from me.” I stepped toe-to-toe with Michael, waiting for him to say another word. Just like the coward I knew he was, he stepped back before readjusting his clothes and walking toward the door.
“Lacy, let’s do this outside,” he threw over his shoulder, and she followed right behind him.
Instead of following them out, I walked back over and sat beside my mother. I wanted her to be the first to hear the words I was about to let come out of my mouth. I knew defying my father was the only thing I could do to break her heart, but I was done living for anyone other than myself. Life was too short.
“I’m sorry, Mama, but I can’t do this. The wedding is off.” I kissed her on the cheek before getting up from my seat and leaving the ballroom altogether. After I told my mother what was up, I didn’t owe anyone else an explanation. My decision was final, and there was nothing anybody could say or do to change my mind. I’d put enough energy into this lie.
Chapter
Three
Gina
I had no idea how I ended up at a bar in the very south of Mississippi, but I was sipping on my third Martini and, from the looks of things, not leaving any time soon. It was karaoke night, and as soon as the man on the mic wrapped up his rendition of Otis Redding’s “The Dock of the Bay,” I would be taking his place on stage.
Open mic was usually reserved for drunk, talentless people who strolled into bars looking for a good laugh, but this man was full of talent. His voice was a deep baritone, and the raspiness that wrapped around his words made his rendition surprisingly calming to listen to. The way he held the audience captive with each word made it evident that he’d done this before. Maybe not on this stage, singing the same song, but I was sure he’d graced many stages before tonight.
Once he brought his performance to an end, the crowd clapped, obviously loving what he’d done just as much as I did.
“Now that was one hell of a song you just sung there, Big Mike!” The crowd erupted, as they agreed with everything the host said. Since I already knew I was next to go to the stage, Imade my way from my seat to take my place. “Y’all give it up for Ms. Gina May!”
The DJ already had my song queued up, and I was ready to go until the last words I’d spoken to my parents replayed in my mind. The reason for my call was not to end the relationship that we’d been holding together by strings of hope and prayer. I simply wanted to see if they would have time to slow down to have a birthday dinner with me. That was all I was asking for. One day, one dinner, on my birthday, but I couldn’t even get that. Yesterday was the last day that I would beg for love that was supposed to come freely.
I let my eyes roam over the bar as I gripped the mic in my hand and better positioned the stand that sat on in front of me. The only time I felt close to my parents was when I was on stage, with a mic in my hand. Sadly, they were the first thing that popped into my head when I signed my name on the form for approval to go up.
Anytime I was on stage, I felt like I was right next to my mom, just as I was as a little girl, singing my heart out with my dad smiling, standing to the side, egging me on. It was one thing to miss your parents, and they weren’t there on this earth, but missing them, knowing that they could come to see me at the snap of their fingers was a totally different thing.
Knowing that my parents could see me and wouldn’t, or that they could make time for me if they wanted to, but they didn’t, was what hurt most. Also, knowing that your parents were somewhere out there in the world, living life without you, was the worst thing that a child could ever imagine, and that was what I was feeling right now. Packing my things and leaving their house was the only way I knew how to take a stand.
