“You check pan har since yuh know she pregnant?”
“Mi did a plan fi go deh,” I retort quickly. I was actually planning to check on Jania tomorrow, even though I know her mother probably hates me right now. Truth is, I’ve already made up my mind. I want her. She’s a better girl for me.
“So how yuh think she feel when you live with a next woman and she breed, bredda? Nuh stress yuh a mek she stress dawg? Yuh can have yuh woman pregnant and nuh link har? Yaw waste man?”
He stands up and steps closer, and I feel the heat of his anger.
I take a breath. “No, a just the situation weh mi inna, and a that’s why mi come yer so… mi plan fi link har tomorrow,” I explain, voice steady. “…Mommy would a question me,” I add, hoping he understands.
He huffs but nods, calming down a little.
How him know ‘bout this though? Mi know a affi Jania tell him but how she reach to him?
I lean on the wall, thoughts crashing into each other like waves. Jah, a wah this man?
Nickoi sits back down and gulps some Hennessy before locking eyes with me again. He seems calmer now, but there’s still fire in his gaze.
“She wah know if yuh a go support har, and mi wah know too,” he starts, voice low but firm. “Cause if you ever say no, youa nuh my bredda! So if a that yaw go say, yuh can figet say we a bredda and a that mi a mek yuh know straight!”
He’s deadly serious, and I nod, accepting it.
“If yuh breed a woman, yuh fi stand up to yuh responsibility, bad man. All if yuh nuh like the idea of getting a pitney. If yuh nuh wah dem thing yah, just stop sleep wid woman. Or use a b’claat comfom. You see the thing wid we though? We nuh meds dem thing yah when we inna the moment. A always one thing deh pan we mind.” I chuckle slightly and nod again, because he’s right.
“Yuh see like how you know seh Zara a the one? A same thing with me and Jania. So mi a support har, bredda. Big woman thing,” I say like a promise, locking eyes with him.
“A nuh me yuh fi tell that though. Say it to har when she fawud wid Zara,” he replies, catching me off guard.
“She a fawud?” I ask, surprised, and he nods, taking another sip of his Hennessy.
“Yah.”
I sigh, already nervous. “How Zara know weh she deh?”
He shrugs. “She soon reach… deal wid unuh thing, mi woman a who mi wah focus pan right now,” he finishes. I laugh softly, then hear a car engine outside. My palms go sweaty, and I rub them down the sides of my Nautica shorts.
“Mi a go help any way mi can. Mi a lef yuh fi support yuh woman. Mi a go check pan mi youth dem,” he says just as the front door opens. Nickoi gets up, heading to the kitchen, and I watch the doorway as Jania walks in. Zara follows, giving a small smile.
“Good night,” Zara says, and I answer her, though my eyes are locked on Jania.
She looks terrible and instantly, guilt washes over me.Why yuh stress out the people dem daughta, dog shit?my conscience spits. I deserve that.
“You good?” I ask softly.
She shakes her head, then walks right into my arms, her voice cracking as she cries, “Mi nuh okay, Jor.”
I hold her close, grabbing her gently by the waist of her jeans. “Mi know a foolishness mi do… but mi a go fix everything,” I promise. She nods against me. We pull apart, and I motion for her to sit on the sofa. She does, looking beautiful even through the pain I know I caused her.
“You go a school today?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “Mommy nuh wah have nothing fi do with me, till mi… till mi hear from you.”
I sit beside her. “Yuh wah nutt’n fi drink or eat?”
“No, mi just wah know if yuh a go support me so mi can go back home,” she breathes.
“Go back home?” I ask, eyebrows raised. She nods. “Mi nah mek yuh go home.” Nickoi calls Zara from the kitchen, clearly giving us space. I respect that. He knows how awkward and emotional this is, and he’s not the type to be up in anybody’s business.
“Feel at home, okay,” Zara says gently, and Jania nods.
