“And in the meantime, you self-destruct. So, what really happened? How did this dream girl of yours get so ticked she doesn’t want to speak with you? And more important, if the shoe were on the other foot, would you want to speakwithyou?”
“No, I wouldn’t.” I didn’t even need a minute to think about that one. “I’ll be honest, I’m not ready to talk about it. I’m in deep shit. I’ve got myself in one hot mess, and I can’t for the life of me findtheexit.”
“Does any of this have to do with Janelle?” Rex asks softly as if with kid gloves. Rex has known Jen as long as I have. He knew how deep in I was, or at least I thoughtIwas.
“It has everything to do with her. And”—a wave of nausea mixed with guilt washes over me for a moment—“I’m not ready to go there with you.” It’s still too fresh, too fucking unbelievable. Once I say it out loud, it will become real, and real is one thing I’m notreadyfor.
“Fair enough.” He squints out onto the field and watches the guys wrestle until they land in a heap at the twenty-yard line. “Look, I don’t want to say anything negative about your ex—especially in the event you get back together—but just know that sometimes things aren’t what they seem. Sometimes people get desperate. If Jen’s trying to reel you back in, just know she’s running on empty, as frantic as they get. People get downright dangerous if they think they’re about to lose what they really want. Desperate and dangerous is a poisonous combo. I’ll find you later tonight to check up on you, but in the meantime—tread lightly, would you?” He slaps me over the back before taking off for thefield.
Tread lightly—but what I heard waswatchyourback.
A thought comestome.
Maybe it’s time to manipulate themanipulator.
I text Jen and ask if she’s up for coffee, and sure enough, she answers with a gleefulhellyes.
Perfect. Meet me at Hallowed Grounds inanhour.
She texts right back.I wouldn’t miss it. I wouldn’t dare miss another moment in this lifewithyou.
I stare down at her words a moment. I can smell the desperate and dangerous. Neither one is a good lookonher.
I’m off to hit the shower, then thedrugstore.
I’ve got a hot date with JanelleWahlberg.
And if I’m lucky—it will be the lastoneever.
* * *
HallowedGrounds has always given me a natural high the second I walk through the door. The heavenly scent of slow-roasted beans lies thick in the air and hypnotizes my senses. I’ve never bothered making a single cup of coffee on my own because I could never get it to taste this great, and each and every time I’ve ever set foot in this place, it’s put a smile on my face no matter how shitty my day’s been. With the exception of today, of course. Not even the scent of great coffee makes up for the fact Harper is pissed off at me. It’s been a long, grueling week, and I’ve had about enough of this silent treatment. And, I’m hoping that this little get-together with Jen will prove to be the catalyst that ends the drought in my life. Harper is the one I’m thirsty for, the one I would give anything to be here with—but today’s shitty facts sayotherwise.
I nod over to Jen, already at the pickup counter with two large icedcoffees.
She trots over in her tight little black dress, her sky-high heels, and that bright orange smile that’s always eaten away at me for some reason. Now I know why. She’s spent the last half a year essentially laughingatme.
“Your favorite.” She hands me the iced mocha, and I follow her to a window seat. I know why she chose it. She wants the whole world to see us together. And as much as I cringe at the thought, I comply. If this afternoon is about anything, it’s aboutcomplying.
“So, this is like a real date?” Her lashes flutter a mile a minute, and I feel the desperatebreeze.
“As real as it gets.” I stop shy of calling it a date. I can’t for the life of me verbalize it. “So let’s start from scratch. It’s been a rough year, and I’m ready for ado-over.”
“Oh my God!” Her eyes enlarge as she leans forward in her seat, that sugared innocence veiling the truth about her. “Yes! I can’t believe this.” Her hand touches her heart as if to hold it in, only a part of me doubts it was ever there to begin with. “So, you really forgive me? We can really push past all thatbullshit?”
“Yes.” I close my eyes as I hiss out the word because I actually believe it. The sludge that I’ve been dragging around with me wasn’t doing me any favors. “It’s done. I forgive you.” I look right into Janelle’s eyes and mean every word. “This is a new day, and I think we’re both readyforit.”
She chokes on her next words. “I can’t believe this. We’ve overcome so much. We’ll have quite the story to tell our grandkids one day.” I flinch as if she cut me. “A story of love, of forgiveness, of redemption and caring, and it all circles right back to love. This entire mess with Justin and Harper has galvanized us.” My heart sinks because the last thing I associate Harper with is a mess. “And just because we’re off to a fresh start doesn’t mean we need to completely let go of the past. I mean, it wasn’t all bad,wasit?”
My stomach turns in its own boiling juices. How do I tell a girl that I’ve spent the last two years of my life with, that someone else is a far better fit for me? Jen is acting as if I’m the great love of her life, and if that’s true, I feel sorryforher.
“It wasn’t all bad.” A deep sigh expels from me. “Your family has always been greattome.”
“Speaking of which. My father really wishes you were interning for him this summer. Maybe next summer? I know for a fact he’s gunning to retire in a few years, and he sure would like someone in the family to take over.” She bites that bottom lip of hers as if to stop herself from outright saying the obvious. Jen has always hinted for me to put a ring on it. “You’ll be able to put that business degree to good use. Once my father opens up a few more stores, he’ll start accepting franchisees. You can be head of the entire So Shoe Meempire.”
I’ve never really seen myself as the captain of the So Shoe Me empire. Trixie has made countless cracks about the name and the Wahlberg family in general. A red flag should have gone off for me two years ago when Trix was never quite on board with the two of us. Although if she never gave Harper and me her blessing, I couldn’t care less. Harper and I are happening no matter what the outcome of today’s littledateis.
“It is tempting.” I lift my drink to mock toast her, and she sucks down a fourth of her coffee. “But what about your brother? He’s into the business, isn’t he?” Jen’s brother, Gerald, has always been the black sheep of the family. Not sure why her father never seemed to embrace him the way hedidme.
