Chapter Seven
Jessie
Eli has been a gem all morning. She took a long nap in her bassinet after her bottle, which gave me time to take a shower and change back into yesterday’s clothes, minus the dirty panties, which I stuffed into my purse.
There are few times in my life when I lose control of myself and agree to things that I shouldn’t, but this morning was one of them.
Agreeing to help Walker until he finds a nanny isn’t just a minor inconvenience; it’s a catastrophe waiting to happen. I can already sense the old feelings that I’ve shoved deep down inside of me making their way back up.
Seeing him doing something so mundane as tying a tie this morning should not have rendered me momentarily speechless. It was as if he were moving in slow motion and the world around us ceased to exist.
Not. Good.
But that’s the Walker effect. He’s always had this magnetic energy around him that my mind and body seem to be in tuned with in a way I’ve yet to experience with someone else.
Too bad that kind of chemistry is wasted on a man who sorely disappoints me every chance he gets.
The front door opens, and Walker comes rushing in like he’s jacked up on cocaine. He marches toward me as Eli rests on my chest while I try to get a burp out of her.
“Uh, is everything all right?” I ask as he paces back and forth.
“It’s fine. Everything’s fine,” he spits out quickly. “Why do you ask?”
His jacket and tie are gone, sleeves rolled up, and the top three buttons of his shirt are undone. His hair is disheveled.
“Um, you have a strange amount of energy.”
He doesn’t stop moving the entire time. It’s unnerving to watch.
He motions at me with his hand like I’m crazy. “It’s no biggie. The first five cups of coffee this morning did nothing to curb how tired I was, so I drank four energy drinks.”
My eyes probably look like a cartoon character who was just run over. “Walker!” I whisper-shout so I don’t scare Eli. “That’s insane! You’re gonna have a heart attack.”
“It’s fine, Jessie. I talked to my senior partners this morning, got in good face time with them for an upcoming case that I want assigned to me, I prepped and got ready for court, AND,” he says loudly after a pause to breathe, “I got on the phone with the top nanny agency in the city. Had to pull some strings, talk up thebig names that I know, but she’s sending over a nanny for me to interview tonight.”
I’ve never seen him like this. He is normally so cool and collected, like nothing can penetrate his icy exterior. I’m not sure I feel comfortable even leaving him like this while I go home. But I need to go home. I need clothes. I have to get some work done. I need space to get back to the Jessie who doesn’t give a fuck about the asshole in front of me. Right now, she’s fading away, and I don’t like it. It’s disconcerting.
“Are you going to be okay if I leave?”
He stops for a beat. “You’re coming back though, right? Remember the shopping.”
A laugh bubbles out of me. “Yes, I remember the shopping. I’ll be back after dinner for bedtime.”
“But I need you here to help interview the nanny. I don’t know what questions to ask.”
“You’re a corporate lawyer at one of the most prestigious firms in the city. You can’t come up with some questions to ask a nanny?”
His face falls. “No. Like, what if I forget to ask something important? Something that could mean life or death for Eli?!”
The mere idea has him pacing around the room again like the Hulk, ready to transform. I can’t watch him like this; it’s painful.
“Fine. What time is the interview?”
“Six,” he replies quickly.
“I’ll be here. Just calm yourself down before I hand over Eli. You’re too worked up.”
He stops and breathes in, counting to himself, then exhales, all while keeping his hands on his belly.
