“You already know my name, apparently,” I begin, switching toward the crowd waiting for me. “But for those of you who don’t know. My name is Eliane Lux Angevine. On the day of the trial, I will be eighteen years old. Which means I am seventeen right now.”
I look around the crowd, looking for support as I speak my words. I speak every word with full confidence while all I want to do is sink through the floor. The eyes of the crowd make me want to disappear, to cover myself with my arms. I glance at Braxton, searching for a smile, but he is focused on the king, not smiling yet, sadly enough. My gaze shifts to Da, and he gives me a comforting nod. My tense shoulders ease as the king continues speaking.
“Why did you enter the trials?” he asks, his eyes darkening, like he is forcing me to say something good. He wants me dead, but Idon’t care. I am not going to lie. If he wanted me dead, he could have killed me when I was a little baby.
I am scared for everything.
But I am not going to be scared for him. I don’t want to seem scared at least. I don’t want anyone to know what I really feel. So I put on a mask.
“Because I have been taken away from my parents by you because of the trials. Because you wanted me to enter.” I sharpen my eyes at him and he stares in them, letting out a silent hiss.
“And what may your signet be?” the king asks, gritting his teeth. He knows there is no damage control for him to do at this moment, because no one speaks up. No one asks why. I swallow the lump in my throat. Da nods at me again, signaling I can move forward with the plan. I focus, stretch out my arm with my palm up, and a ball of light appears above it. Silence falls over everyone. I gather the magic, weaving all the light together. The entire palace brightens, and cheers and applause fill the air as my eyes follow the light spreading through the halls. I look into the crowd again. My eyes meet those of Braxton.
“I am a light wielder,” I breathe out smiling, locking our intense eye contact. “And I am the one and only sun wielder to exist.”
The king’s eyes widen, and he rolls his shoulders back.
“Well thank you, Eliane, we are very excited for what you have to show us during the trials.”
I can’t help but smirk at the king. I threw him off balance and I would swear I heard him sputter. My eyes find Braxton’s again.
He chuckles.
And I mean really chuckles. His hands cover his mouth fast, but it is too late.
I saw his dimples, and I don’t think this will be the last time I see them. I will make it my mission to make this boy smile again. I can’t help myself. And I can’t seem to wipe this stupid grin off my face as I walk off the stage.
“I’m going to head out for a bit,” I announce.
“That’s fine,” Da responds. “Just don’t go too far, Goldie.”
I nod, jogging upstairs. Me and Da already trained this morning. It felt good to fight all the feelings from yesterday’s announcement away. I am still wearing my training clothes from earlier. A tight T-shirt hugs my body. I can feel the point of the dagger tied on my leg, pinching in my thigh as I look around in my bookcase. I climb up the ladder to reach a book from an upper shelf. Lights from across the room gather and bolt towards that one book, that one book I needed to find.
“Aah, there you are.” I slide over, grabbing the book before I jump down. With the book under my arm, I pace outside. The waterfall comes into my sight and I slow down.
In a few days, a week before the start of the trial, we are expected to stay at the palace in a side building. Why I have no idea of. It stresses me out, but Da comforted me earlier and told me he would be there too so it should be fine. In front of me appears my well-known willow tree. My favorite actually. On top, the twigs split in three. With the leaves hanging down it has a sad appearance, but if you look closely, it will be the most beautiful tree you have ever seen. I throw my book up in the tree. My hands grab the barks as my feet try to find a spine to stand on so I can climb up. I pull myself up, holding onto a twig. My feet step on the splitting of the tree and I sit down on the biggest branch, close to the water and lean back, grabbing my book again. My gaze falls over the small lake and waterfall beside me. The water is clear blue and around the water are plants and flowers growing wildly. They have no desire to be controlled and every year they seem to pop up wherever they like. Trees, like the one I am sitting on, surround the small lake.
It looks magical. I clench my book to my chest as the memories sink in. Da used to take me here as a kid. I would take his bighand, and we would walk here together. We would sit by the water, and he would tell me fairytales. After that, I would run into the lake, my little feet splashing all the water around as Da lifted me up and flew me through the air like an airplane. I would scream and giggle all the time and Da would follow my lead. Sometimes when we came here, deer, bunnies, or birds would sit and drink water out of the lake. I think that is where my love for those animals comes from. When Da told me about my future and I got older, we would come here to practice my signets. He didn’t want me to train my signet much as a kid. He homeschooled me and wanted me to have a as normal life as possible. He just wished for me to be a kid. He wanted me to enjoy the little things I had and for that I am thankful.
Between the tree, the sun leaves misty light rays covering the waterfall. I focus on my signet as the memories flood in. A tingle flows through my body and I need to release the book to let my hands free. A little ball of light flies through the air. I take a deep focused breath and feel my heart pounding. I breathe out. The light ball that just flew through the air explodes. All the lights separate and find their place, leaving little sparkles of light on every surface they could find. My stomach feels funny. Like there is a little tingle moving in there. It always happens when everything lights up. Maybe it is a feeling of happiness, or relief. I wouldn’t compare it to a stomach ache or period pain. This part of my signet I have under control. I can light things up. But that isn’t the thing that I came here for. I need to learn how to control the sun, and besides that, I need to blind someone. A shiver rolls over my spine. I just need to find a victim first.
But first things first—reading. Maybe after I finish this book I will have gathered the courage to take the sun away and blind someone.
A ball of light dancing next to me is the only light left, making it possible for me to read the pages. I sit quietly as I look over to the last few pages of my book. I think I can do it. I will try to take in the sun tomorrow. Just for a second. My breath pitches in my chest, the task scaring the shit out of me. This book holds centuries old theories about signets. Since I am the only sun wielder that we know of to be alive in centuries, no one can really help me with producing this kind of magic. The books confirm that there has been someone with the signet of the sun a very long time ago. Sadly enough, she isn’t here anymore to help me develop mine. I am very lucky that they described her use of magic in very old books, but it is hard to read sometimes. This book is handwritten in a cursive that isn’t used very often anymore. The letters are tortuous and elegant, but the ink has faded more than I would like to admit. I am lucky I love reading, otherwise this would have been a really tough job. Not only do I like reading, it feels like this book holds magic in it. Besides the dust falling out of it, it makes you feel something. And no, it isn’t the mold and dust that is falling onto my knees. When I was a kid, something in the old magic and historical books attracted me. I would grab books like they were toys. Da always looked at me weirdly, but as I got older, I tried to explain to him that it felt like a magnet was pulling me towards them, like there was something in there they wanted me to see. I still haven’t figured out why I have this gift. I close the book with a slam and jump out of my tree, landing on my feet. As the night falls and the stars appear I turn back to my home.
“Are you ready?” Da implores, a frown appearing between his brows.
“Always.” I shrug. “Besides, even if I weren’t, I should practice. Did you see those other candidates at the announcement?” A shiver rolls over my spine.
“Yes, Goldie, I did. They seem like they are very strong, and they probably are. But they are not you,” he responds. He put his hand on my shoulder leading me outside. The morning sun shines on my face while the worries consume me. “Did you see that girl with the tattoos and short hair? She appeared to be a shadow wielder, Da. She can turn everything dark,” I imply.
“I know, it is going to be strenuous, but they don’t have what you have,” he breathes out, smiling proudly. I raise my hand and let the tingle wash over me. Power erupts from my palms and a bowl of light flutters above it.
“You mean this?” I fold my lips together and close my hands in a tight fist. “What is this if I can’t do what they expect me to,” I snap. “I can’t do anything more than turn everything bright. I am a bright person, Da! I can’t kill someone using my power. I know they suspect me of having the power to burn the fucking continent, but what if I can’t,” I whimper, my voice breaking. I sink through my legs on the ground and regret not practicing earlier on taking the sun away. I am glad Da let me have my childhood, but even when I got older, I was scared of my power, scared of what it could be. I believe even Da was scared of my signet when I was young, and he was afraid of me losing control so he didn’t let me practice my sun wielding at the beginning. However, he did teach me to fight and how to build my mental walls at the age of three. When I was four years old, my walls were as strong as anyone else’s.
“I am so sorry, I just want to be good. I don’t want to hurt them. I will hurt if it is needed, but I am not a murderer and I don’t kill for fun.”
He takes my face between his hands and lifts my chin up.
