The humid night air soothed some of the tightness in my chest. But it was still tainted by the sharp smell of livestock and the ruckus from the inns.
Without thinking, I wandered off the only road and into the woods. The soft ground muted my boot steps, and the heavy trees drew a curtain between me and the village. I’d never been somewhere like this in the dark without being frightened.
But nothing sinister awaited me here. A few small creatures skittered in the brush, but the rest of the woods breathed peace.
Something I desperately needed, yet rarely found.
I had an almost inexorable urge to run. To flee through these welcoming trees and bury myself so deeply in their embrace, no one would ever find me. The world would move on. I wouldn’t have to face my guilt or my crimes.
I wouldn’t have to face those I’d failed, as I’d just faced Helene and Isabel. Acting as if I deserved any of their gratitude.
Delysia’s accusatory face surfaced in my mind. When she’d told me to leave because that was what I was good at. I’d wanted to argue with her, but now...
I’d always looked for a way out when things grew difficult. I snuck out of the palace to drink and gamble and have affairs with charming men. I’d wanted to leave Rellmira when Father began planning my tactical marriage before Mother’s death. And I’d disappeared into Renwell’s shadow after she died.
Had I truly helped anyone by spying for Renwell? My first mission concerning Garyth. And this one with Aiden. Both onlyseemed to bring more death, more guilt, more pain. He claimed I was doing my duty, serving the crown, protecting it.
But sometimes it seemed the people needed more protection from the crown.
“Kiera,” a deep voice said behind me.
No twigs had snapped, yet I’d known he would come for me.
Where would I go?
Nowhere I wouldn’t find you.
Chapter 34
Kiera
I sighed,turning to face him. “You didn’t need to follow me, Aiden. I would’ve come back for you.”
He stepped close enough for me to see him in the faint, silvery light. He carried something lumpy on his back. “I wanted to make sure you were all right.”
I’m not.
I gestured around me. “I’ve never been in the woods before. I can see why you and Maz love it so much.”
His smile gleamed. “The forests of Twaryn and Dagriel are different than here. But it does always feel a bit like coming home.”
Crickets chirped and leaves rustled as we stood gazing at each other. These silences between us were always different, as well. This one had a warm familiarity that made me want to close my eyes and rest in it.
“Why did you rescue Garyth’s family?” Aiden asked.
The warmth faded. I shrugged, trying to look nonchalant. “I was there, and Melaena couldn’t do it.”
“But you insisted on coming along.”
I gritted my teeth. “Yes, I see that was unnecessary now. But I simply wanted to ensure they reached safety.”
“You areneverunnecessary.”
My heart galloped like that damn horse at the vehemence in his voice, the heat in his nearness.
“Why do you continue to risk yourself for others? Why do you insist on staying in danger?” he whispered.
“Perhaps for the same reason you do,” I breathed.
