And I could tell he appreciated it. There was this unspoken sense that we were on the same team. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasinsomething with someone—not circling around the edges, not tagging along, but actually inside it. Together.
“So, how are you feeling about the big run-in?” I askedcautiously. Reid hadn’t said anything about Meghan and the boyfriend since we got home. He didn’t seem overly affected, but I also couldn’t imagine Reid crashing out. Holding in emotion seemed more his move.
Reid sighed and leaned against the kitchen island. “It was fine. Honestly, better than I would have thought. It was good that you were there.”
“Really?” My heart pounded at the admission.
“Yeah, I was more relaxed. And you making a joke out of the thing really broke the tension. Thanks for that.”
“No problem.” I chewed my lip, dying to ask him more. “You said the divorce was a while ago, right?”
“Just over a year.”
“And you were together for…”
“Since senior year of college, so six-ish years.”
“Holy shit, that’s a long time,” I blurted out before smacking my hand to my mouth.Damnit Hazel. Play it cool.
But he just shrugged, as if he didn’t care. “I mean, I thought it was going to be much longer before she told me otherwise,” he joked, a smile reaching his eyes.
I studied him, searching for even an inkling that he wasn’t okay. It had to be hard, thinking you’d spend your whole life with someone, only to have it end. Especially since it didn’t sound like it had been his decision.
“And you haven’t moved on since her?” I asked, shifting the topic of conversation back to him.
Our gaze broke like a trance as he started scrubbing the dishes in the sink. “I mean, I’ve dated a little, but it isn’t exactly a priority for me.”
“You don’t want another relationship?” I wondered if he’d ever consider getting married again, but I didn’t ask. I wasn’t sure if it was because it felt inappropriate, or because I was afraid the answer would be no. Even though there was nothing even close to official between us, I still didn’t want his answer to be no. Not at all.
“I mean, I’m fine with the idea of moving on, I just wantit to happen naturally. I’m happy on my own. I’ve got a life, and I’d rather be by myself than change just to fit someone else’s standards.”
“And she tried to change you? Your ex?”
“Kind of. She always wanted me to try new things, branch out. Maybe it’s a character flaw of mine that I didn’t want to, but I liked my life. I was happy.”
I turned around completely in my chair, leaning my chin against the back as I watched him. “But she wasn’t?” I asked.
He shrugged. “I guess not. Maybe it was just incompatibility at the end of the day, and no one’s fault, but it still stung that I wasn’t enough for her.”
Reid was so sweet—soft, kind, wouldn’t hurt a fly. The idea of someone hurtinghimmade my stomach twist.
After a second, I let out a breath. “I know what you mean. My ex was always trying to change me. Said I should dress cuter, or be quieter, or clean more.” I stuck out my tongue, pretending to gag. “Eventually, I’d had enough. I couldn’t sit through his constant criticisms when, at the end of the day, what was he even bringing to the table? It was like he wanted me to take care of him, but I could barely take care of myself.”
“Hazel.” Reid’s voice was soft, gentle. “You take care of yourself just fine.”
“I think my current predicament would argue otherwise,” I joked half-heartedly.
“Your current predicament isn’t your fault.”
“You keep saying that, but if I had just been more responsible?—”
“No, it’s not your fault,” he insisted, sharper this time. “I mean, I wouldn’t hate it if you were a touch more responsible. Like, maybe don’t post your whereabouts and your exact financial situation for people to take advantage of, and whatnot.”
My lip turned up in amusement. “I’ll have to give that a try going forward.”
“And for the record, your ex sounds like a complete idiot.”
“For the record, so does yours.”
