He glanced down at my mouth. “What if.”
16
Eyes wide, I stared at Ryan. I stared at his lips that I’d wanted to slam mine against the other day without any fear of all the repercussions I knew could happen, wondering if this was still some sort of joke, a tease that Ryan would pull back away from. He would go back to his friends and his team and his sports house. I would be all alone again, save for Vadika—at least until she, too, ran away to whatever graduate school she was likely going to be fully funded to attend.
I would be that weird little witch girl who couldn’t steal a soul for her own, so unlike what Ryan had said to begin with when we saw each other for the first time.
So unlike we were now.
“I know I’m hanging by a limb here—”
Before he could say anything else ridiculous, I stopped him. I stopped him as I reached forward and set my hands on his thighs that I’d always wanted to touch, feeling the muscles I had known were there flex beneath my palms as I leaned up and let my lips hover over his, waiting long enough to know he could pull away and set all things to right again. For now, I could get over it. I could pretend that I was still sleeping and this was all just some very wonderful, steamy dream.
No harm, no foul.
“Can I—”
He didn’t let me finish before he met me halfway this time. No hesitation.
We kissed carefully, as if we were talking a soft banter that made him smirk and sigh when we pulled back an inch before tucking ourselves back into each other in a new form. More confident as his tongue traced the line of my lips and I could feel my body shiver.
“And here I thought, you said you didn’t like me all that much before.”
“We’ve both said a lot of things we didn’t mean once,” I whispered.
Lifting his hand up to my face, Ryan traced a path over my eyebrows, parting my hair away from my face.
We kissed until his breaths became a symphony in my ear. His and mine melted together. When we pulled apart, the world came back into focus—from the way the quilt twisted under our legs to the window shining moonlight over us. We gasped. Yet still, we didn’t let go of each other. We were too far past that now. My hand still cupped the back of his neck before I came up for air.
“I really wanted to kiss you.” His hand was flat against my stomach, curving around my waist. “You have no idea.”
“I really wanted to kiss you too,” I whispered.
The words caused a small groan to escape Ryan, making my wish come true twice when he kissed me again. And again, carefully pressing his tongue at the seam of my lips until I was the one melting with a soft whimper.
“What was that I said about waiting for this?” Ryan seemed to ask himself. “What anidiot.”
Tilting our chins, we found new ways for our mouths to meet, feeling the crest and sighs of our breaths between each moment we broke away from one another. It was not like the last time. Thealmost-last time, where our lips had just met, as if a mistake were easily erased by exhaustion and misunderstanding. This was no mistake. This was meant to be. This was destiny.
This was me, and this was Ryan, and we were kissing as if we were talking like any other day, any other moment. We were both soft and easy.
Ryan held me to him as we continued to touch and feel over our clothes, trying to get closer.
I couldn’t believe that this was happening. I almost wanted to laugh, smiling into his mouth.
How is this happening?
“Can I?” He looked over me, still very much clothed, where his hands were fisting the bottom of my shirt, right at my belly button. “I want to see you.”
I hastily nodded, kissing him once more under his chin. His breath hitched. “Yes, please.”
He broke away, pulling back away from me as his breathing remained uneven. “You need to tell me. You promise? You need to tell me if I’m doing something wrong.”
I nodded, eager for him to kiss me again. “Promise. But I’m pretty sure that’s impossible.”
Ryan’s nervous chuckle breathed through my lips, letting me part them open as his tongue gently slid along the inside. Hesitant, but oh so curious—exactly like him.
I lifted my hands up, and he pulled my shirt carefully over my head. Staring down at me, he seemed in awe for a moment before he realized where my hands were. They tugged at the hem of his shirt, trying to take it off and throw it down to the floor along with mine.
