I scratch my head as I pick up the poles. “I think these go through the holes, right?”
“I don’t know, but um, nature calls.”
“Don’t go far.”
“’Kay, Mom.”
“Need help?” comes the deep cadence of Kaiden’s voice. With Sam guarding me like a Pit Bull and everything unfolding between her and Malik, we haven’t said much to each other since we left Ashville. I turn on my heel to look at him. The stubble on his cheeks is longer than usual. I lock my muscles so I don’t cave into the urge to rub my palm against it.
“Um, yeah,” I respond.
He bends to place a rolled-up sleeping bag on the ground. “It’s Malik’s. He wanted Sam to have it.”
“Oh, that’s nice of him.” I look over my shoulder at Malik andRhett, who are busy making a fire pit.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell her it’s his, though.”
I grimace. “You’re right. She would probably prefer sleeping on a bed of snakes than accepting anything from him.”
He crouches to clear the ground of twigs and rocks. When he stands, he’s so close we’re practically sharing the same breath. “I’m going to need these.” Kaiden’s hands linger on mine as his fingers wrap around the poles. Electricity sparks in the air between us. I let out a shaky exhale. His eyes are obsidian fire as they drop to my parted lips. “Fuck me. That little freckle above your lips is driving me crazy. Idreamabout it. I’m so desperate to taste it.”
“I might not have magic, but I swear to Hecate, if you don’t back off, demon boy, I’ll throw rocks at you,” Sam clips out from behind me.
Her words are the equivalent of being pushed into a pool of ice-cold water. I step away, barely keeping my balance because my legs have turned to mush. Jesus, it’s like we’re two magnets on a collision course. No matter how many times I try to remind myself of his betrayal, I still can’t escape this insane attraction we share.
Kaiden glowers at Sam over my shoulder. Heaving out a heavy exhale, he starts putting together our tent. Soon enough, we’re all gathered around the fire, sharing beef jerky and the freeze-dried meals Rhett had already prepared for his next trip to Faerie. As much as I hate to acknowledge it, since being in Kaiden’s presence again, my appetite has somewhat returned.
“I was expecting to see more destruction, to be honest,” I say to break through the awkwardness blanketing the air. I have to admit, Rhett is an attractive man. His looks are not as striking as Kaiden’s or as unique as Malik’s, with his lively silver hair and feline eyes, but you can definitely tell he’s not human. His features seem to have become sharper since we crossed throughthe portal. More startling.
The flames reflecting in the peridot of his irises only enhance that otherworldliness. “That’s because there are no villages or cities this close to the Wasting Woods. It’s dangerous to settle around here,” he says.
“How was growing up in Faerie?” I ask not only because I’m curious, but because I want to know what my mother’s life would have looked like. She mentioned in her journal how she always longed for another existence. I wonder if she would have been happier here in Faerie, or if she ever came to terms with what my grandparents—if I can even call them that—did to her.
“Well, obviously, there’s no technology, so it was pretty different from what you experienced. But…I had a good childhood. My father was a swordsmith, and my mother owned a bookshop.” A wistful expression softens his features. “There were only two years between my brother and I, and we would always get into trouble. Fighting the neighbors’ kids, pulling stupid pranks, you name it. Once, we almost burned down the house. Mom was furious. We never had much, but it was enough to keep us happy and well fed. Until the war came.”
He doesn’t have to continue for us to deduce that his family is gone—the pain is written all over his face—so I decide to change the subject. “Did Adrianna ever mention my mother? Her name was Eliana Harper.”
“I’m sorry, no. She also never said why she was looking for an oracle. But she wasn’t the type to share too much anyway. That woman was harder to crack than a safe.”
“How does magic work here exactly aside from it being sentient? Do all fae wield the elements like you and Adrianna?” Sam chimes in. Her back is almost fully turned to Malik. Ever since she fell into that lake, he has been orbiting around her like a hawk. It’s as if he’s afraid she’ll vanish into thin air if she’s farther than three feet away.
“Mother Draia bestows her gift upon chosen fae. Those who receive her blessing are born with it. Most times you’re not even aware you can wield magic until it awakens. However, it’s rumored that all fae born after the war are powerless. Even the royal children, which is unheard of because the royal bloodline is sacred—the closest to our gods. They are said to have the most aether coursing through their veins, which all fae inherit from the gods.” He takes a swig of water. “It’s the reason vampires hunt us; aether makes the blood addicting and allows us to live for hundreds of years. But the war angered the gods and Mother Draia, and she has turned her back on us. Not only are the lands dying, but magic is dwindling too. That’s why King Orion forced all fae who can wield the elements to join his army by royal decree. The most powerful form his personal guard.”
“And if you refuse, what happens?” Malik inquires.
Rhett arches a brow. “Guess.”
I can’t resist my next question. “Have you seen or heard about fae with the ability to wield shadows?”
Kaiden’s eyes are two blazing coals that brand the side of my face as soon as the words leave my mouth, but I don’t meet them.
“I’ve only heard of it. The only fae who can wield shadows are those in the royal family of the Unseelie court.”
Sam holds my gaze for a few weighted seconds. That moment when the vampire bit me in the cathedral’s crypt pushes to the forefront of my mind. He said that my blood smelled sweeter than any of the fae he ever drank from. I know it’s a crazy jump, but what if my mother was from the royal Unseelie bloodline? Or are my powers a result of the experiments my grandparents did on her?
No matter how hard I try, though, instead of getting answers, I only end up with more questions. It’s frustrating. I feel as though my whole life has been blown to smithereens and no matter how hard I try to put the broken pieces back together, they don’t fit.Idon’t fit. Leaving the Order was the best decision I ever made—I know that. But at the same time, I feel I’ve lost my place in this world. I hoped maybe I could find it here…but here doesn’t feel right either. I’m starting to think I’ll never find it, even after that wall in my head is torn down.
Sam yawns from beside me, pulling me out of my thoughts. “I’m beat. See you guys in the morning,” she says while stretching and disappearing into the tent.
