Shaking my head, I try to clear the filthy thoughts. They aren't doing a godsdamn thing to discourage my erection or my guilt.
I promised Sheena I would never use my abilities on her without her consent, but if she were to give me that kind of trust, the possibilities would be endless.
She won’t. You can’t. Gideon . . .
I shake my head, stepping closer to the mirror to distract myself with how creepy my face looks. There isn’t a single blemish. Not a damn thing. I look like some wannabe influencer who's been through ten rounds of fillers and filters. The dark circles, the slight bags I woke up with this morning, and the faint laugh lines I've had for several years are all gone.
I’m parasitic perfection, unnatural, dangerous, and primed to hunt.
Incubus demons are notorious for their beauty. For me, my appearance has always been the one thing I couldn’t ignore, marking me as a predator against my will and serving as a barrier to true connection.
My trembling fist itches to shatter the glass and destroy my reflection, but the door clicks open before I can strike. Gideon steps inside without knocking, shutting the door behind him, then scanning my face thoroughly.
If I look unhinged, he looks shell-shocked.
My shoulders slump. He’s here to kick my ass, and I won’t try to stop him. After all, I put my hands on his mate. We study each other in the tense silence, his unruly curls sticking out in every direction from where Sheena pulled on them as she chased her pleasure on his lap.
Fuck. I've got to stop thinking about that or I'm going to pop another hard on just in time to get the shit beat out of me.
“Dude. Your face...” Gideon shakes his head, his long strides erasing the distance between us.
“Yeah, it's weird,” I mutter, hating how awkward this feels. We both sound like we've never strung together a complete thought in our lives. But how can I tell Gideon—the one person who’s never left my side—that I want the woman who’s meant to be his?
I could lose him over this.
“I’m so sorry,” I tell him, the words spilling out of me in my desperation. It's true. I am sorry, but it's a hell of a lot more complicated than that. Maybe, if I find the right words, I can make him understand that?—
“Sorry for what?” He groans. “That was so hot. I came in my pants like a teenager.” His eyes flash golden, then he studies me like I’m a math problem that won’t add up. I open my mouth to says gods know what, but I don’t get the chance.
“Anyway, I’m here to hammer out a game plan for tomorrow. I don’t think Sheena is up for talking more about the traffickers tonight.”
I hold up my hand to shut him up.
“Wait. Wait. Gideon, Itouchedyour mate. Saw her come...” I cringe, bracing for the punch.
He nods slowly, concern for me on his face. Shit, he must not have noticed how bad it was in the moment. I rake my hands through my hair. I have to tell him, have to let him know how far out of line I was earlier.
“Dude, I whispered all kinds of dirty shit in her ear,” I admit. “I told her I wanted her to ride my face until her legs collapsed and I drowned.”
He growls at that, reaching down to adjust himself.
“Stop making me picture that. I just put on clean shorts.” Gideon chuckles.
The sound abruptly cuts off when he notices whatever look is on my face.
“Gods, you’re fully freaking out right now, Cal.”
When I nod, he rolls his eyes. It reminds me of Sheena’s reaction to my explanation of the dangers of incubus powers.
“I need you to help me hold it together,” Gideon says. “Maybe that’s not fair, but I can’t figure this out without you. You expect me to lose my shit, mark my territory, tell you to fuck off. Well, I won’t.”
I don’t know how to respond. I’m too hung up on him admitting he needs me.
“Yes, she's my mate, but I don’t own her.” He grabs my shoulders with both hands. “We’re getting to know each other.”
Gideon’s forehead furrows. I know this look. He wants me to understand—to help him articulate his thoughts, and normally, I would, but I’ve never been more confused. When I gesture for him to go on, he throws his hands up.
“Shit, I'm so bad at explaining. I liked seeing your hands on her. I loved hearing you whispering all that sexy stuff in her ear.” Gideon grins. “But maybe cut it out sooner next time, so I don’t blow in my pants again and give her the impression I can’t last.”
