“Yes, all of it.” I felt my chin start to tremble.
Jones took a step back. “Don’t do that,” he whispered, but his hazel eyes softened.
“I had no other choice.”
“That’s bull, and you know it.”
I closed my eyes as the tears that filled them slipped out. “You have to believe me when I tell you that. I wanted to keep you, Jonesy, more than anything. I wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on your beautiful face. Everything about you was made for me. Only, if I stayed there, if we were together, you would have hated me.”
When he didn’t say anything, my eyes flew open to find him watching me with his own tears on his cheeks. I wanted to comfort him, hold him in my arms, and tell him how Iloved him. Even now, after all this time. That it had only always been him.
“You can’t do this to me again. I’ve worked so hard to forget you, this, us. That summer we spent together. Please, just leave me alone. We can be colleagues who don’t speak to one another. Who don’t make eye contact,” he whispered.
I tried to swallow the thick lump in my throat. “Did you ever, when we were together, think that you might love me at all?”
A sob escaped Jones’s throat before he turned to rush toward his RV. I knew he would lock me out, keep me from talking to him if I didn’t catch him, and I was on him in a second. Crushing him against my chest and wrapping my arms around his body.
“I love you,” I murmured in his ear. Jones’s body trembled at my words. “I’ve never stopped.”
“You... l-left m-me,” he choked out. “You made love to me, and when I w-woke up the next morning, you were gone, along with all of your things. It was like you never existed. You ghosted me. It felt like I was d-dying. For weeks, Ollie and Travis forced me out of bed. When our parents got married, I was terrified you would be there with a girl. Only it felt much worse when you didn’t show. Like you pushed the final nail into the coffin. That you couldn’t be bothered to show your face. Like you never cared.”
My already-broken heart felt like it was cracking again. “My father told me not to come to the wedding.” Jones stared up at me. “I bet he didn’t tell you that part.”
I wanted to kiss the shit out of him. Press my mouth against his, bite and nip at those soft, plump lips that I hadbeen dreaming about for the past four years. Mark him like I used to. Show everyone who he belonged to.
“He said you were busy. That you had school, obligations in Boston, and a girlfriend. That you couldn’t take time out of your hectic schedule to come down to North Carolina. That you were going to pro-pose to h-her soon and there would be a b-big wedding.” His voice shook with emotion.
I raised my hand to tuck a wayward curl behind his ear. “Jonesy, my sweet, sweet Jonesy, there is no girlfriend. I never touched Beverly when I returned to Boston, and the obligations are not what you think.”
“Please.” He sniffed as more tears welled in his eyes.
My throat tightened. “Do you want me to go? To leave you alone and not bother you. Because all you have to do is say the words. I’ll turn around and walk away for good.” Even if felt like a knife to my heart.
Jones opened his mouth to respond, but then clamped it shut. He shook his head, and I let him untangle himself from my arms. “I want you to explain everything to me.” He raised a hand when I started to object. “Start from the night we... uh, had sex and go from there.”
“Does this mean you’re letting me into your RV?” My heart thumped loudly in chest. Maybe I had a chance here. I was scared to even hope.
Jones gave a quick nod. “You don’t get to touch me or try to lure me into bed. You’re going to spill everything and then you’re going to leave.”
Like hellI was.
***
Once inside the RV, Jones ordered me to sit so he could go change out of his fire suit. I pulled the zipper down on my own and tugged it down around my waist while I poked around in the kitchen, looking for something to drink. I was pleasantly surprised when I found hard cider. I grabbed two, popped them open, and placed them on the small table. Then I glared at the photos hung on the wall. Mostly of him and Ollie, a wedding photo with our parents, and one with Travis and a pretty red-headed girl. I hooked my arms behind my back as I noticed that Ollie was next to Jones in all the photos. Jealousy stirred in my stomach. Had they hooked up, or were they really just friends like Jones claimed they were? I had my doubts.
“Didn’t I tell you to sit down?” I spun around to find Jones watching me, now dressed in a pair of sweats and a loose-fitting t-shirt. His curly blond hair was damp, and I longed to drag my hands through them. Lure him to sleep as I murmured in his ear how much I loved him.
I smirked. “When did you get so bossy, Bashful? You used to be so polite.”
“I’m still polite, but I don’t let people walk all over me anymore... You helped yourself to my cider.” Not a question.
I shrugged as I moved to sit down. “I’m glad you still drink it.” I pushed the second bottle across the table toward him.
Jones stared at me before he finally sat down. He took a sip of the cider and raised his brows. “Well? I’m waiting.”
“Oh, you want me to just jump into this conversation?”
“That’s why I let you inside.”
