Tommy leaned closer to see out the window. “It looks like a memorial.”
Angel immediately thought something bad had happened while they were away, and the words, “Oh my God,” slipped from his mouth.
Jessi’s eyes shot to him, and he knew she was thinking the same thing.
“Don’t jump to conclusions,” Tommy reassured. “Someone would have been in touch with us if something happened.”
“Our phones have been off.” Jessi frantically turned her phone on, and Angel did the same.
Message alerts started pinging like crazy, and dread filled Angel’s gut.
Even Tommy looked concerned now. “What is it?” he asked.
“Nothing,” Angel answered, scrolling through his messages. “All my texts are asking if we’re having a good time, they miss us, and welcoming us home.”
“Me too,” Jessi said. “Wait.” She paused. “Here’s one from Ella. Stopped by your house the other day. The fans really miss Immortal Angel.”
“Is that what this is about?” Angel asked, but no one answered. They just continued to stare out the window. As the limo drew closer, Angel silently read some of the signs.
We want Immortal Angel Back!
We Miss Immortal Angel!
Don’t Go Tommy!
Lawn stakes in the shape of broken hearts dotted the grass. Giant cardboard crying emojis hung on the fence alongside flowers that looked like they’d been there for weeks.
When the car stopped so the driver could open the gate, Tommy, Angel, and Jessi all got out of the car. “I don’t believe this,” Tommy said, staring at a sign that begged him to return to the stage.
“Your fans love you,” Jessi said, filled with empathy and sounding as if she were speaking from her own heart. “They miss you. They miss Immortal Angel.”
She glanced at Angel, and they shared the same heartsick feeling. Only Angel never let on how devastated he was by Tommy’s decision to leave the band, so no one knew how hard it hit him. Not even Jessi. It was the first time Angel had ever kept anything from either of them. Damien was the only one who knew how shattered his heart had been at the news. Almost three months later, and it still hadn’t healed. He mourned the loss of Immortal Angel just as if he’d lost a dear friend, just like the fans. He wouldn’t pressure Tommy, though. When and if Tommy was ready to return, it had to be on his own terms. In the meantime, Angel was forced to deal with the devastation.
Tommy fingered some of the mementos left on the gate and in front of it. He had a look of disbelief as his wide eyes took in the display. “I still can’t believe this.”
“I can,” Jessi said, unsurprised. And then she returned to the car and waited.
Angel went to Tommy, who held a fresh bouquet in his hand and studied the note attached to it. “What does it say?”
Tommy handed Angel the note without saying anything, and Angel read it.
Your music saved me when I was at the lowest point in my life as I struggled through my bisexuality. You gave me the courage to admit to myself and to others my true persona. Because of you, I live open and free. Because of you, I’m alive today.
When Angel looked up at Tommy after reading the card, Tommy had tears in his eyes. “I can’t believe I touched someone I’ve never met before like that.”
“You have no idea how much your music has inspired people.”And how badly my heart is breaking without it.Witnessing the fans’ reaction hit Angel like a head-on collision. He felt their pain and loss, and he couldn’t look at it for one more second. He joined Jessi in the car where he sat, dumbfounded and catatonic.
“What’s wrong?” Jessi slid over to him and clutched his knee.
Angel didn’t want to burden Jessi with his grief. He lost a big part of his life. Even if Immortal Angel were to move on without Tommy, which wasn’t an option as far as Angel was concerned, it would never be the same. Angel would never be the same. Tommy was his muse. The best part of music was that he shared it with his husband. His best friend. His partner in life. That was gone. Cut out like a cancer. Only instead of losing something ugly, he lost something beautiful.
The last two months had been a fantasy vacation in a gorgeous island getaway, so it was easy to forget. To put the pain away. But right now, the truth was strewn all over the entrance to their home, and he couldn’t ignore it. The sorrowful outpouring from the fans hit Angel in the gut the moment he saw it, and it re-opened the gaping hole in his heart with the jagged cuts of a razor. The pain spread through his chest like a wildfire and consumed him.
He re-played the day Tommy told everyone that he wanted out of the band and the aftermath that followed. He had tried to be supportive, so never vocalized or shared how much Tommy’s decision ripped his heart out. Not even to Jessi. The only one he opened up to was Damien, his oldest friend, and that painful conversation filled his memory . . .
Damien paced in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows in his loft, but Angel couldn’t do more than hang his head.
“This is bullshit,” Damien barked. “We’re on fire. Our last album grossed more than anyone projected. Why the fuck would Tommy want to leave the band now?”
