The crease in Derek’s brow and the soft lopsided smile invited Travis to bare his soul, but he couldn’t tell Derek about the hard strap across his back and buttocks that he had received when he was a child. Or the slaps in the face. The black eyes. The physical pains had healed long ago, but the emotional ones lingered.Those were the ones that hurt the most. The belittling and humiliation were scars that ran deep, just like the prediction that he’d never stay out of trouble and would end up in jail. The words were getting to him, and he pushed them away with a deep breath. “I don’t want to talk about it. It was a stupid nightmare and I’m over it. I don’t want to think about it ever again.”
Derekseemed helpless at the reply. “Are you sure? I think you came here because you wanted to talk. And I’m all ears. I got nowhere else I need to go.”
Overwrought with warm feelings he wasn’t used to but that he craved, tears filled Travis’ eyes. He took a deep breath and swallowed it. “Thank you.”
Derek sat back on the couch and moved closer to Travis, so their shouldersand thighs were touching. They sat together, not talking, only circling their fingers together with soft strokes. After a while, Derek brought Travis’ hand to his lips and placed a comforting kiss on Travis’ knuckles. Emotion rising in his throat, Travis felt the tears brimming on his lower lids again, and he didn’t know why. Maybe tears threatened to fall because of how much Derek cared. The manseemed genuinely interested and worried.Why? Why does this man care so much? Why does Derek want to ease my burdens?Travis wondered. He searched his brain for an answer, and then scolded himself.Why did there have to be a reason? Was it that farfetched to consider that Derek was genuinely worried about me?Maybe it was so hard to believe, because in the past no one had.
Derek staredat him, through him, with intense green eyes the color of dark jade. They broadcasted honesty and integrity. No malice. Travis had always been an excellent judge of character, and he knew Derek was a good man, with a good heart, and maybe that’s what brought him to Derek’s room.
Travis lowered his eyes, because he knew what would happen if they continued to make eye contact, and hewasn’t here for sex. He knew that Derek probably thought that was his intention. Why else would a guy show up at 4:00 a.m.? Travis had merely been looking for a friend, and he realized how foolish it sounded. “I should go.”
“No,” Derek said softly. “This is nice. Just sitting here. Not talking.” He sunk lower in the couch, squeezed Travis’ hand a little tighter, and placed his barefeet on the coffee table.
It took Travis a few minutes before he relaxed enough to match Derek’s posture, but before long he also lounged languidly across the sofa with his feet up. He let his head roll to the side so his cheek rested on Derek’s shoulder. Slowly, Travis’ eyes grew heavier and heavier until they closed completely and he fell into a deep sleep.
