“Thank you,” I whisper.
“For what?”
“For reminding me what there is to live for.”This. Us.
He places a kiss on the top of my head. “All this and more.”
My body relaxes against his. As I feel his breathing slow, his arm wrapped around my ribcage, I realize that this would never be a one-time thing with him. The way he worships me with his words, his body. The way he searched to find me, and I him, in a crowded, chaotic arena. My soul has been beckoning him since the moment I laid eyes on him. The motion-activated lights turn off due to a lack of movement. As the silence envelopes me, tucked tightly against his chest, I allow myself to get lost in the comfort Leo offers, and it feels like peace.
Thirty
“What do you meanyou’re not going?”I’ve done a lot of things to push Orion’s buttons, but hearing him this pissed off at me is new. I lounge in the armchair in my room with one leg crossed over the other, picking at my fingernails. Unbothered, unmoving.
“I mean, I will not be attending training.”
He somehow manages to become more still, statuesque. The only sign of movement comes from the anger burning in his eyes. He raises an eyebrow, his voice lethally calm. “Just for today? For how long, Zellie?” Oh, he’s mad, alright. This unhinged, wild look, though? It’s doing something for me. My insides flutter disloyally.
I peer up from under my eyelashes. “Indefinitely.”
“For fuck’s sake, Zell!” He bursts from his chair and begins to pace, his hand running through his hair. The motion is rushed, stressed. I should feel guilty about putting him in this position. I should… but I don’t. Holding a grudge is one of my strengths—not my most shining quality, but still a strength.
After spending the past few days entwined with Leo and engaging in intense self-reflection following the last challenge, I questioned who I want to be. The answer? Not a woman who bows quietly at the hands of men, at the hands of corrupt power. I am meant for more than this. While I may not have magic or be able to hop on a fucking shooting star—I have my mind, my heart, my soul. I will not allow myself to be taken advantage of or to be made into a spectacle.I am not to be underestimated.
Quietly, I’ve raged, meticulously plotting how to enact my revenge for being stuck in this unfair, twisted nightmare. The first act in my grand plan? Skip training. Let it be glaringly apparent to the Kosmos thatI see them, and they do not frighten me, nor will I back down. Humans are not disposable—I am not disposable. Hopefully, this inspires confidence in others to take a stand and refuse. There can’t be any Games if there aren’t any participants. That may take some convincing on my part, but I’m taking this day by day.
“I can appreciate you trying to ‘stick it to the man’ here, but if you haven’t noticed,this isn’toptional.”
“I don’t care.”
“Oh? And you don’t care that when I meet with the Kosmos to update them on your progress, I have to tell them there is none?” His voice increases in volume.
Well, I have to admit I didn’t think of it like that. “Bend the truth?”
“Oh, yes, let melieto the highest power in all the galaxies. I’m sure that will fare well for me. Do you hate me that much?”
“I don’t hate you.”
“I’msorry, Zellie. How many times do I have to tell you that before you stop punishing me?”
I chew on my cheek, considering my words. “I don’t regret my refusal; however, I’m remorseful about the position it puts you in.”
He throws his hands up and spins towards the door. “She’s remorseful. Fantastic.”
“Something has to change, Orion!” I yell after him.
“I agree, but this isnotthe way.” He slams the door without another word.
When I’m sure he has left, I stand and peer out the window. That went as well as I could have hoped for. There’s no pleasing everyone in a revolution.
Day three of the seven-day cycle, and the others are getting curious. Orion has kept quiet about my protest. While I let Leo know my plans, I didn’task for his participation. He has been suspiciously silent about whether he has been following suit. Celeste knocks on my door with Lenny in tow one evening after the training session has ended.
“I told you she wasn’t sick,” Celeste chides as she and Lenny stroll in. She throws her arms around me in a tight hug.
“Only boycotting the system.”
“So rebellious. Iloveit.” Celeste squeezes once more before releasing me, heading to the sofa, and flopping down.
Grabbing and filling cups with water, I respond, “Something has to change. Where’s Aria?”
