Kai moves to push Lucero off. “Watch it!”
“This has nothing to do with you! Stay out of it,” Lucero growls at Kai.
“Don’t shout at him!” I snap. “Tell me why I’m different, Lucero! You didn’t get to know me, you have no idea what I’m like or what I care about. I’m just the lucky owner of a soul fate, or whoever, forced you to want!”
Lucero lets out a frustrated sound and moves back a few paces, raking his fingers through his dark hair. “This is my fault, I’m doing a terrible job at explaining. Golden, please, I’m sorry for making you feel like…like you’re trapped. But you mean everything to me, I have waited for you since—”
“Since your other soulmate died!” I cry out. “You’ve had so many bloody soulmates at this point, you might as well have a factory churning them out! Same original recipe, but in new flavours.” A pounding thumps between my brows. “How many sides do you have if you can fit into all these different lives?”
Hurt flashes in his eyes. “Do not devalue what I shared with my soulmates. Or what I share with you, though you are so ready to toss it aside.” His voice drops, low with a quiet anger, insulted.
Shame, ugly and twisted, coils in my stomach. How does Lucero make me feel so wanted and unwanted at the same time?
“We’re going in circles,” he says, trying to shake away that anger, seeking patience again. “Kai is right. You need rest, then when I explain things correctly you’ll understand why I love you.”
Kai frees a breath. “Finally you’re making sense—”
“Whoa, love?” I back up, creating more distance between us. “We haven’t even spent a day together.”
“Because you keep pushing me away!” he fires back, which seems to surprise Lucero and he shakes himself out of it. “Golden, please. You feel our connection, your pull to me. Why don’t you want this?”
“When you were human you changed yourself to fit into the lives of women, then stole their money. As a vampire you changed yourself for each of your…your soulmates.” I met his intense blue gaze. “You say you love me, but do you even know whoyouare?”
He stumbles back as if I'd slapped him, hurt reflecting back at me. I regret it, want to take it back, reach out to apologise. Lucero would never hurt me.
But his stare sharpens and I hold back.
“I offer you a palace but you demand the gutter where I found you?”
“It was actually a park,” I shot back, jaw clenching to stop more tears falling, “bellend.”
He laughs without humour. “Always hiding behind your little jokes, aren’t you, Golden? Well I see you, too. A small boy who uses sarcasm to push everyone away. A tale as old as time. Maybe you’re right, maybe you aren’t unique. That’s how you see yourself isn’t it? Just another factory-made copy.”
“Way too far, Lucero,” Kai spits. Moving so his body shields mine.
I swallow back the hurt, clench my fists. Anything to not crumble on the floor. “Fuck. You.”
He stares at me for a long time— I wonder what he sees, probably the truth I’d been trying to hide since I was slumming in that mansion; I was the ghost haunting those walls and he’s wasting his time on someone who isn’t real.
Lucero curses in another language before storming towards the door. But before he passes through the frame he hesitates, large shoulders tense.
Wrapping my arms around myself, my eyes linger on his back hoping for…what? I don’t deserve anything anyway.
With one final look, he leaves the way we came, leaving me alone with Kai, and it’s a confirmation of everything I’d been telling him. I always knew if I pushed hard enough Lucero would see that I’m not worth the hassle.
Everyone leaves, why not my soulmate, too.
Kai’s hand lays on my shoulder, firm in his comfort but gentle. “Oh, Golden…”
“That didn’t go well.”
I turn to find a man standing by the door. He’s tall, lithe, painfully beautiful; long black hair, pale brown skin, eyes as dark as a black mirror.
“Let me guess, another vampire?” Kai asks, and moves so he’s between me and the newcomer.
The man strolls forward, graceful as a dancer. “I’m Ramy.”
If only I could fight off the wave of incredible jealousy, but I’m too tired. Lucero calls me beautiful when he lives with this man? I look down, not even bothering to hide the tears this time.
