With a quick mental snap of the connection, I power down the screens and savor the control I wield...at least over electronics.
But not over my stubborn hellion of a wife. Who failed to mention exactly why I needed to port home earlier today.
I missed feeling those first kicks under my fingers, of sharing the wonder and joy of that magical moment. That’ll be something I’ll bever be able to get back. My chest burns with pressure.
“Why didn’t you just tell me, Red?” My tone is low and strained. “Why?”
Tilly glances at the console with a frown, then she whips around to investigate my face. Her lips thin. “Oh, let’s be honest. I highly doubt you’d have come home even if you knew. It seems you have time for everyoneexceptus.”
She stands and sets KJ to the floor of the ship. Blood flushes her neck and cheeks. Her hands clench into fists as she plops them onto her hipbones.
“I spend twelve-hour days,or more, up on that ship for you and my son.” I step closer, my height towering, forcing her to crane upward to inspect my face. “So stop being a little martyr and show some goddamn appreciation for what I’ve been doing for you.”
A dry laugh flies from her lips and she pokes my chest. “I’mbeing a martyr? You’ve gotta be fuckin’ kidding me. Do you really think you’re doing this for me—for us?”
“Of course I am.” I’m so furious and hurt, yet something else rises with the anger. Shame.
“Because from where I’m standing, it sure seems like you’re doing this foryou.”
“I can’t believe I’m hearing this.” I whirl away, needing to put some space between us. “I come home to find you sneaking around behind my back, talking to your old flame, and you have the fucking audacity to accusemeof not caring about you or Kaden?”
“Rhys has never been a flame and I did not say that.”
“You might as well have,” I shout, the rein on my temper slipping. “It’s not enough that I spend nearly every waking moment scouring trillions upon trillions of code, looking for the one little glitch interfering with the weather systems. Or combing the hardware to anticipate what could go wrong with the life support system on the planet, or why the worms underground aren’t working at peak efficiency.”
“Stop yelling at me. I never asked you to do all that. If you’ll recall, I didn’t even want to live here, but you didn’t give me a choice, did you, you conceited, exasperating jackass.”
I shrug out of my coat and throw it onto the metal floor, my sweat-soaked skin needing the cooler air of the dome. “I made the decision because it’smyresponsibility as your husband to keep you safe because let’s face it—we both know you need it.”
“Oh really?” she hisses, sprinting around me to block the exit. “Well, Kaden is my son, too, and I should have some say in how I want to raise him. If you’re soqualifiedas a protector, then why did I nearly get cut open like a side of beef, huh?”
My blood turns to ice. I stare at her for thirty seconds. A slight tremor pulses through my skeleton and it takes every ounce of willpower to contain the rage I want to unleash. Not at her, but at this situation. I hate that we’re fighting, but I’m the one in the right.
And her last sentence, reminding me how inadequate I’d been under Silarrian’s power, causes a hot rush of blood to shoot to my cheeks.
She swallows, then drops her gaze. “Wait. I—”
“Maybe it would’ve been better if I’d never come back for you after Aurora. Maybe you and Rhys could’ve set up house, let him raisemyson as his own. Maybe that’s what you wanted all along, hmm?”
“No,” she whispers, raising her eyes to mine, her hand reaching toward me. “You know better than that.”
“I don’t know anything anymore.” I shrug her touch away and stalk out of the ship, my booted feet scraping against the coarse sand on the ground.
“Jareth, wait. I’m sorry.”
I ignore her plea and stomp down the stairs, waving away the two carriers stationed at the front entrance.
The sound of her thudding feet follows me. “Please stop. Give me a chance to—”
“We’re done talking. I’ll take the couch. Goodnight.”
I sit on the couch and tug off my boots. Keeping my gaze to the floor, I make out her feet shifting, as if she’s trying to decide whether she wants to stay or go.
I lay down and shut my eyes, folding my hands over my chest, trying to make it as clear as possible that I have no more interest in this conversation. If I do, I’ll implode.
“Goodnight.” The press of her warm lips onto my forehead almost undoes me, and for a moment, I want to take my words back, to pull her down to lie beside me and stroke her hair.
Instead, I turn on my side and replay our fight.
