I just see future Me and future Ben, in some alternate reality, and instead of yelling, I want to weep now. Wow, this day just keeps getting better and better.
“You too,” I manage to say.
I pick up my pace and try to get this over with. Harper asked me to pitch in and help because, thanks to my famous spouse, her business is exploding. And because she doesn’t want to ask more of her underpaid staff on Christmas Eve-Eve. And because she picked me up from the airport and heard the whole story and knows I’m devastated and spiraling.
Stomp-squish-stomp-squish-eff-my-stupid-life
I reach her storefront but as I push in, the door is pulled out of my grip by a gloved hand attached to a rich son of a gun.
“Aiden?”
“Janie,” he nods.
“What are you doing here?”
“Getting my ass chewed out by your friend. Again. Bye.” He shifts past me, ignoring the million questions on the tip of my tongue, then stops. He looks back at me, glances around to make sure no one is looking, then glares. His voice is just above a whisper but comes out angry and cutting, “He’s devastated, you know. Completely and totally destroyed.”
“Ben?”
“Yes, of course, Ben, who else did you lead on while you were still in love with your ex?”
“Wait, Theo?”
He grimaces, “I don’t know the guy’s name I just know if you were in love withhim,you should have told Ben when you knewhewas falling in lovewith you.”
“He-he left,” I stammer.
“Yes, he heard you telling your friend you still loved, Theo, I guess, so he decided to let you go. He’s a better man than me, I’ll tell you that, said he wanted you to have all the love and all the money and be free and live your best life or some other bullshit, but on his behalf I’m telling you to go f—”
“Wait!” I raise my voice, then step to the side of the sidewalk and pull him with me. “Wait. Aiden, I told Skye I loved Ben. I don’t know what he thinks he heard but I am not in love with Theo!”
“Oh,” he freezes up.
“So you saw him? I thought he went to London,” I say, my mind reeling.
Aiden nods, “Just got back from snowboarding with him in Canada. He should be in London by now.”
“Snowboarding,” I say, and some of my hope withers. “And in London? Is he having a quiet Christmas with his folks?”
Aiden laughs, “Of course not. He’s got some yacht light parade down the Thames he’s organizing before he leaves for Tahiti the day after Christmas.”
“Right.” More withering.
“He’s just distracting himself, though. He’s a mess. Over you.” Aiden looks away, probably at his hired car, then back at me. “You’re going to tell him, right? I can get you in the air in a half hour probably.”
“I…I don’t know,” I shrug, then slump my shoulders, “Maybe it’s for the best.”
“Well then I stand by my original message for my friend. Janie, all due respect since you’re a woman but,get f—”
“You don’t have the whole story, you jerk!” I yell but he's already walking away. He just raises his hand straight up, his middle finger on display.
Wow.Hatethat guy.
I shake my head, trying to sort my thoughts. I look inside The Roasted Chestnut looking warm and cozy and cute as ever. It won the decor contest this year and I know it’s because Ben kept “finding” extra decor we didn’t need at our place and leaving it in her storage closet. I can’t go in there and fake any cheer right now. I pull out my phone and text Harper that I’m running a few minutes late.
I start walking.
Nowhere, really.
