I inhale deeply and let the air out as we move through the grand lobby, nearing the double doors that hold the Canton Christmas extravaganza. Even though we’re in Tulsa, Oklahoma, or, as Skye would say, smack dab in the middle of fly-over country, everything around us is opulent. This is a gorgeous building that, while probably not that old, screams old money.
And the holiday party is even more over the top this year than previous years because Skye’s oldest sister used the room for her vow renewal ceremony just before this event started tonight.It’s going to be gorgeous in there. Classy and Christmassy. And crowded. And…judgy, I guess.
“Remember,” Ben stops us right before we’re in view of any of the party-goers. “You stick with the truth, I’ll bang on with all the made up little details. And Samantha is here. You know she’ll’ve already told them our entire life stories.”
“I…it’s not even that. We convinced your dad, we’re only about a week away from sealing the deal before January first. It’s…I…”
“Skye.”
“Yeah, isn’t that stupid? I mean it’s not like she’s an ex-lover or something. Why am I so nervous? Do I look nervous? Oh, man, it’ll be like blood in the water for her if I walk in upset and—”
“Janie,” he says, and I wonder if he had to stop himself from calling me my name, his pet name for me. “I don’t understand exactly what’s happening here, a girl thing, I suppose, but you look bloody fantastic. No nerves, no insecurities. I mean, look at you,” He says, stepping back and looking me up and down. Normally he’d be all confidence, undressing me with his eyes, but those big blue gems have sadness in them. He tries to hide it. “I recall all those times, you always walked into these things so gorgeous, so unaffected, so bloodycool,you know? Intimidating. And that’s exactly what you’re going to do tonight.”
“But—”
“But nothing. She gave up your friendship. She let go of one of the best things that ever happened to her. She’ll probably dash over to us and beg to make it right with you…or she’s a wanker.”
That gets a laugh out of me. “I didn’t know women could be wankers.”
He reaches out and barely touches my ear, straightening one of the tear drop ruby earrings he gave me to go with this dress.
His voice gets scratchy, “Anyone who loses you is a wanker.”
I look away from his beautiful too-easy-to-read face, breathe in again and nod.
“Okay, thanks, I, I think I’m ready,” I say, and with a squeeze of my fingers, he leads me forward.
Our entrance isn’t as dramatic as I feared it would be. The crowd doesn’t hush, only a few people stare, and mostly at Ben. Though he’s rich and famous, so are a lot of the guests here. Ben is approached by a few men right when we walk in, and I’m grateful for a way to stall. He introduces me and makes jokes and I wait. But not long.
“Janie! Ben!” Sam calls as she approaches. “C’mon! Everyone’s dying to see you guys in person finally!”
Ben politely excuses us and we follow Samantha to the front corner where all of the Cantons are gathered. Susan is in a stunning white gown and all the others, Sadie, Sally, Sam, and Kat, are in champagne dresses in different, chic styles. And so is Skye.
All of the women, with varying shades of blonde to light brown hair, wavy and styled to perfection, and their husbands, crowd us for hugs. They congratulate and scold us in equal measure, on our wedding and then for keeping ourselves scarce since. Everyone has hugged me, even Jon Canton, their sweetheart of a dad, until, finally, Skye approaches.
“Congratulations,” she says stiffly as she leans in for a hug. Her dress is exactly what I would have expected, short and edgy. Her hair is a darker caramel than when I last saw her, and her hazel eyes sparkle with mischief. A stab hits me in the chest. I really, really missed her.
“Thanks,” I reply, just as awkward.
“So, you’re really married, huh?” She says, looking between Ben and me.
“We really are,” Ben says, putting his hand on my waist and clutching me to his side. He kisses my temple, “Took some convincing but even she caved to my undeniable charm.”
Skye and I both make the exact same scoffing sound. We lock eyes after that, and I know what she’s about to say.
“Want some air?”
I’m about to say sure, ready to rip the Band-aid off. Skye and I have never been small-talkers. There's no beating around the bush with us. But my sweet, protective, temporary husband squeezes my hip.
“We just had air, didn’t we, Janelle? Loads of it,” Ben tries to help. I wonder if everyone can hear that his voice is a bit off. There’s a happy-go-luckiness that’s absent. Because of me.
I’m still studying him when Skye asks us, “Janelle?”
“Isn’t it adorable? Just like his brother, Emerson always calls me Samantha, never Sam. So romantic,” Sam sighs.
“I thought you hated your name,” my former best friend pushes.
I shrug, “I did, but not anymore,” I look up at him and smile. I try to silently thank him for healing one tiny piece of me. His eyes go all soft and he uses the moment as an excuse for a quick, hard kiss. Samantha squeals. Again.
