Malcolm comforted Toni in the living room, and now he was waiting for Marquise. My chest tightened at the possibility of another outburst or possible fight. We reached the car and Malcolm stood, squaring off with his twin.
“Quise,” Malcolm said, and hugged his brother hard, as if they didn’t live together. “You good to drive?” he asked, patting him on the back.
“Yea, I’m good. Is Mom, okay?” he asked as his voice trailed off toward the end.
“Mom and Khaira are cool. She is beating herself up for inviting Toni over. I can’t say you won’t get an invitation to the therapist this week,” Malcolm said.
“I already have an appointment with Dr. June tomorrow anyway,” Marquise said.
He’s back in therapy.I wanted to hug him but decided against it. Hopefully, she can help him process what happened tonight.
“Aight, man,” Malcolm said, and we parted ways.
“Baby, why do I feel like I did something wrong?” Marquise said as I wrapped my legs around his body.
I squeezed him as hard as I could as his tears landed on my skin. He hadn’t said much on the way home. If I had to guess, hewas replaying the events in his mother’s living room, screaming his pain to his family.
“I don’t know, baby, but you needed to get it out,” I said as he cried.
The vibration of his chest and the soft wailing watered my eyes. If I could fix this for him, I would. No one ever talked about the residuals of hurt and abuse that you carried through life. It’s like finding glitter two years later, after you vacuumed a thousand times.
“Baby, don’t leave me,” he murmured.
I squeezed him harder, kissing the side of his head. “I’m not going anywhere. I love you, which includes your hot temper and protective nature,” I said.
“Promise me, Erin,” he requested in a shaky whisper.
“Give me your eyes.”
Marquise lifted his head, and I examined the sadness draped on his face. “I promise. I’m not going anywhere. Working in the music industry, I learned the most talented people are usually the most broken. They surround themselves with yes people to face their inner battles. You have people who care about you, including me. We love you enough to call you out on things and help you pick up the pieces. You’re going to have to work a little harder to get rid of me. I haven’t even spent your money yet.”
He kissed my face, and I giggled.
“You know you can have anything you want,” he said, planting more kisses on my neck.
“I have what I want and it’s you,” I said.
“Nah... I haven’t been spoiling you the way I should be,” he said, and I chuckled.
With Marquise’s head on my stomach, his feet dangled off the bed. The repeated movement of his chest signaled he was asleep. I wanted to join him, but my mind was in Chicago with my father. Mom and I had made strides talking to each otherevery morning and the more I learned about her life in Florida, the more my resentment grew for my father. I didn’t ever want to experience the pain I witnessed between Toni and Marquise with my parents. I scrolled to his name and finally answered one of his texts.
Me
Daddy
Daddy
Are you okay? I miss you. Tell me you’re coming home.
Every question he asked was loaded. No, I am not okay and I missed Eldridge, not the street Pastor. Before I left Chicago, he would be the first person I’d call if I needed help. Today, I would never call my father because we held two different definitions of assistance.
Daddy
This silence is killing me. Your Uncle Maalik won’t tell me nothing.
It’s because he didn’t know anything. With the tour in full motion, wedding planning, and spending time with Marquise, my time was full. I still hadn’t selected a date to meet Uncle Maalik’s new girlfriend.
Me
