Chapter Eight
August 2000…
The heavy, humid air was a blanket on Drew’s chest, the weathered wood dock solid beneath his back, and if he concentrated, really concentrated, he could tune out the voices in his head and focus on the sounds all around him - the lake water lapping against the pylons below, the drone of the night insects going about their business, the rise and fall of the wind as it stirred the leaves on thetrees.
“Drew, you fuckingfag.”
Okay, so maybe tuning out was an overstatement, because the voices in his head wereloudand sounded very much like Parker Galbreath’s taunts from earlier thatnight.
The athletic director here at Camp Burgess - a sweet, pretty, unbelievably-earnest college student named Katrina who somehow managed to put up with dozens of idiot teenagers like Parker gawking and catcalling her all summer long - sometimes talked about positivity and intentional breathing, so Drew was trying his level best toinhale peace and creative life force, while exhaling negativity.But he was pretty sure there were limits to what yoga breathing couldaccomplish.
The pain in his stomach made him gulp down a sob, and he pushed himself up to sit, wrapping his arms around his knees and knuckling the moisture from his eyes because he was fourteen fucking years old and he’d be damned if he’d cry, even when there was no one there tosee.
The world was wide and ancient,he reminded himself. And his life would be far longer than this one miserable summer, way bigger than Camp Burgess, and filled with guys who were not SebastianSeaver.
Raucous laughter sounded across the water from the left bank of the lake, shattering the peace of the night, and Drew couldn’t stop his traitorous ears from listening for onedistinctive voice he’d always been able to pick out of a crowd. Would Sebastian be over there laughing with the other guys? WithParker?
Drew inhaled deeply and turned his head away, not wanting to catch even a glimpse of the bonfire he knew was set up on the beachthere.
The Burgess Bonfires were a camp tradition, he’d learned back in July, when his mother and Mrs. Seaver had dropped him and Bas off with lovingly packed suitcases and stern instructions to “be careful.” Careful hadn’t been the plan for either of them, though. They’d been way too thrilled at the freedom of being off by themselves for a whole summer, away from anyone else who knew them. Bas, Drew knew, had been excited to play a role besidesgenius nerd.Drew had just been excited to spend every free minute with Bas who didn’t alwaysgetsocial things and relied on Drew to guide him. He’d been confident this summer would be nodifferent.
But it hadbeen.
Drew touched his forehead to his knees as his mind tracked back over the past six weeks, trying to figure out when it had all started to go wrong - whathehad done to make it gowrong.
There’d been the first dinner - the one where Parker announced that being a Seaver made Bas agamer geek, as if Bas being the stunningly brilliant son of America’s richest tech genius was in any way a bad thing. It had been so obvious to Drew that Parker was jealous of Bas - of his famous family, his artfully messy hair, his stunning blue eyes, and the broad-shouldered, loose-limbed grace that had made Ella Flores flirt with him all afternoon, but Sebastian hadn’t seen it. And the second Drew had opened his mouth to blast Parker with a witty retort, Sebastian had stopped him with a glare, flushed beet red, and spouted some made-up bullshit about nearly failing a class this past spring because he’d been drinking toomuch.
Drinking.
When Bas had never had more than a couple glasses of winein hislife.
While Drew had gaped across the table at him, and Parker had slapped Bas on the shoulder jovially, Bas’s wounded eyes had begged Drew not to deny it, so Drew had kept his mouth shut and hadn’t brought it upsince.
Then there’d been the obstacle course a few weeks after that, where the campers divided into two-person teams competing to solve problems designed to challenge them both physically and mentally. There had been no doubt in Drew’s mind that he and Bas would be an unstoppable team - Drew was a strong athlete, Bas was easily the smartest guy in camp, and they communicated like they’d been best friends forever, because theyhad. So, he’d walked across the green and taken his spot next to Sebastian, who’d been laughing with Parker, Jason, and a bunch of other guys Drew didn’t particularly like, and he’d asked, “Who’s on our team?” Bas had hesitated, his eyes flickering quickly to Parker and Jason. “Oh, you’re on McMann’s team?” Jason had snickered, shoulder-checking Parker like he’d made some kind of joke. “Good luck, buddy.” Bas hadn’t said a word, but his shoulders had gotten tight and he’d barely said a word to Drew for the rest of the day, even when they’dwon.
And then things had gotten worse and worse untilfinally…
Yesterday.
It had been cold and rainy - one of those weird autumn days that crop up in a New England summer - so Drew had let Ella and Colleen drag him to their art thing in the afternoon, rather than swimming in the lake with most of the others. Drew had learned weeks before not to seek Bas out for activities, since he insisted on hanging with idiots, and other than seeing each other in passing in the bunk room or at meals, they barely spoke anymore. So, he’d sat at a table in the community room, silently staring out the window at the rain, while the girls painted seashells and chatted about the bonfire. The one and only reason Drew was looking forward to the party was because then this fucking camp would be over, and maybe he’d get his friendback.
And then Bas had staggered in, drunk off hisass.
Drew had jumped up to help him, but Bas had waved him off and hobbled over to take the seat next to Drew, his bright, flirtatious eyes locked on Ella across thetable.
“I fell off the dock,”he’d told them, lapping up the girls’ sympathetic cries. “Managed to twist my ankle on the waydown.”
Drew had stared incredulously at this guy who looked like Bas and sounded like Bas, but in every other way was a shadow image of the Sebastian Seaver Drewknew.
“And here I hoped you’d decided you wanted to come paint with us,”Ella hadteased.
“Shhhh.That may have been the real reason,”Bas had whispered, grabbing a paintbrush with a wink and getting to work on one of the stupid plastic seashells from the stack the girls werepainting.
Ella had giggled, and Drew hadn’t been able to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “Yeah, Bas is a huge fan ofart.”
“Fuck off, McMann,” Sebastian had groused, but he’d smiled at Drew, really smiled, for the first time in weeks, and that had made Drew relieved… andbold.
“See? So cultured.”Drew had smirked at Colleen, and that was why he’d missed the giant glob of blue paint Bas flung at hisface.
