It pisses me off how easily she said that. My fingers curl around the ball tighter.
I should have told her differently. Should have said the words that could’ve fixed it all, or maybe I just didn’t have the right ones.
Maybe I'm an idiot.
I throw the ball one last time, winding up to toss it when I hear the knock.
“Yo, open up!” Chase yells from the other side. “Don’t make me knock it down, man. Big bad wolf comin’ in hot.”
Groaning, I get up and head for the door. I expect the usual, but seeing the six-pack of beer and bags of food takes me off guard.
“Told you I brought backup,” Chase announces, flashing a grin as he slides past me.
Troy trails in behind, holding up a greasy paper bag like it’s the prize of the century. “Here. Double cheeseburger for the sulker.”
“I’m not sulking,” I mutter, watching them crowd into my space.
“Right, sure you’re not,” Chase says as he plops down on the couch, already tossing me a beer. “And I’m the coach’s favorite.”
Troy snorts. “We’re here to stage an intervention. Sit down, man. We need to know why you’ve been acting like a moody teenager for the past couple of days.”
“I’m not—”
“Sulking,” Chase interrupts, leaning back, cracking open a beer. “It’s cool, dude. So… is it Alli?”
The second her name registers, I go still. It’s like something snaps in my chest. I fidget with the beer can but don’t bother opening it.
Troy eyes me before speaking up. “Yeah, it’s Alli, isn’t it?” His eyebrows lift. “Look at your face.”
I throw them both a glare, but it doesn’t hold. They both just look back at me like they’ve cracked a code.
“Man, you really are messed up over her,” Chase adds, nudging Troy. “This could be fun.”
“Yeah, it’s complicated,” I confess, sinking into the chair across from them.
“Complicated is just a nice word for ‘I don’t want to deal with it,’” Chase says, taking a long sip.
Troy leans forward, folding his arms and getting serious. “Yeah, complicated is just a wall you put up because you’re afraid of what's on the other side. So, tell us, what’s the problem with you and Alli?”
I swallow hard, the lump in my throat making it harder to get the words out, and Troy’s philosophical advice throws me off a bit. My hands tighten around the edge of the table.
“I messed up… and so did she. But there’s more to it. Serena’s pissed at me, too… everything feels like it’s breaking apart.”
Chase raises an eyebrow. “Ah, there we go. There’s the drama. This definitely sounds like a conversation about”—he drums on his thighs—“feelings.”
I roll my eyes. “It’s not like that. It’s just… everything is so twisted right now. I thought I could handle it, but I guess I’ve just been screwing it all up.”
Troy’s brows knit together. “What do you mean, screw it up? How?”
I rub a hand over my face. “I keep making the same mistakes. First with Alli, telling her I didn’t think we could work because I’m messed up or whatever, and then with Serena, pretending everything was fine when it wasn’t… lying to her, also. And now it feels like I’m just waiting for everything to…” I mimic an explosion with my hands.
“Okay, fine, I’ll bite,” Chase says, leaning in like he’s all in. “You know it’s not about making everything perfect, right? It’sabout not making the same mistakes and owning up to your shit. You’ve gotta face things head-on. If you keep avoiding it, talking about the what-ifs, and running away, it’ll eat you alive.”
“Chase is right,” Troy chimes in, crossing his arms. “And, look, I get it. It's easy to sit here and overthink mistakes, but if you care about Alli, you don’t have the luxury of waiting for a perfect moment. You fix it right now.”
I let out a frustrated exhale, turning the beer in my hand. “I don’t know how to fix it. She looked at me like I broke everything… like I ruined her.”
There’s a long silence before Troy speaks again, “Look, if you care about her like you say you do… you won’t let her walk away from you.”
