Delete.
Tell me to stop thinking about the way your skin felt under my hands, because I can’t.
Delete.
Tell me this isn’t real.
Delete.
I stare at the blinking cursor for a while longer, heart pounding, thumb itching to hit send on something, anything, but I can’t. Because those harsh words from the cafe are still ringing through my mind.
“Josie is what? Twenty-five?”
“Just about. And he’s got to be at least forty. I mean, really.”
“I’m not saying it’s scandalous. Just… it’s a little inappropriate, don’t you think?”
“He’s her boss. And her elder. That kind of power dynamic? Not exactly romantic.”
This isn’t like me at all.
I really don’t know what to do for the best.
And I donotlike not knowing what to do.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Josie
I waketo the faint smell of cedar and soap.
Knox.
The bed’s warm on one side and empty on the other. I reach out instinctively, fingers brushing a crease in the sheet where he’d been not long ago. My heart does this fluttery thing in my chest, that same traitorous beat that started last night and hasn’t let up since.
My muscles ache in a good way. My body feels heavy, but not sick heavy like it did a few days ago. Just… soft. Used. Cared for.
I sit up slowly, still bundled in the blankets, and that’s when I see it. A note on the nightstand.
I reach for it, stomach flipping like I’m sixteen again and someone just passed me a folded square of notebook paper in homeroom.
Didn’t want to wake you. You looked too peaceful. I’ll see you at The Marrow when you’re feeling up to it. Please rest. You need it. K.
I read it twice, maybe three times.
Man, he’s so him.
Soft in the quietest ways. Protective. Thoughtful. Even when he’s not here, he feels present. Like he’s looking out for me, even from a distance.
I am supposed to be off. Technically.
Doctor’s orders were rest, hydration, and no stress.
But this idea has been building in my head for a while now, and this morning it’s really taken root. I know I won’t be able to shake it.
I’ve been thinking about it a lot.
The way Knox talked about his nonprofit in Austin when we were at his house. The pride, the purpose. It had lit him up from the inside.
