Page 76 of Addiction

“I didn’t hear what she said.”

“Because your mind is elsewhere. It has been for most of the night.”

“I’m fine.”

“Asher,” he warns.

“There’s nothing to fucking say, Grayson,” I snap, leaving my seat. “I need to take a piss.” Anger bubbles in my blood, and my mood quickly falls by the second.

I need to go home.

I need to call Theo.

I need Wade.

You need a drink.

Just one.

“Fuck!” I slam open the door to the restroom, almost taking it off its hinges, and the voice in my head beckons once again. After relieving my bladder, I head over to the sink and turn on the cold tap, splashing my face with water to try to focus. As I close my eyes, all I see is Wyatt, all I hear is his voice before it quickly turns to an illusion of Wade standing before me, his lips so perfect, his eyes so damn inviting, his body…

Desire hits my lower stomach, and my fists grip the porcelain sink.

I can’t think like this anymore. I need a distraction.

Just one, Asher.

“No. No. No. No!” I slam my hands on the sink, looking at myself in the mirror.

I’ve got this. I can do this.

“I’m Asher fucking Nelson.”

No man or inner voice is going to bring me down again.

Not now. Not after coming this far. It’s just a bad day. I’ve had them before and got through them. I can get through it again.

But as I leave the restroom and return to the bar, all my confidence in remaining strong is gone as quick as lightening when my eyes latch onto Wade, who is looking sexy as fuck.

Jealousy roars through me like never before when I see Logan right next to him.

Too close for my liking.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Wade

His avoidance today has left an unexpected void inside—a hole I’ve felt getting wider ever since he left my place. His actions have both been recognized and inappropriate, but the uncertainty I’d felt at the gym today has no comparison to the anxiety I’m feeling right now as Asher stands at the other end of the bar, holding me hostage with his eyes—eyes that not only scream confusion but fear.

Fear of what, I don’t know.

Fear of me? Fear of what lies unsettled between us or the fear of what he’s feeling on the inside. A feeling I once felt myself many years ago when it registered with me that I was different. That my sexuality was different.

His dark, haunted eyes are enough to make my heart break and my chest contract because he’s trapped in a place that doesn’t have to feel as hostile as he’s making it and one that can give him so much happiness if only he’ll accept it.

But putting that aside, his actions toward me at work today have made things a little clearer to me, and if Asher himself isn’t prepared to change his ways, I need to do it for him.

“Right, this one is on me. What are you drinking?” I drag my eyes away from Asher and look to Logan who is waiting on an answer.