He wasn’t mad he’d taken that shot. It had taken him a long time to figure that out. He was pissed because he couldn’t get it out of his head. The final straw that had forced him out of the BPD.
Mati nodded. “Yeah, I wouldn’t be able to sleep for shit after that either.”
David blinked down at Mati, because…was she joking?
She looked back, her smile sad and sympathetic. She wasn’t joking.
No one had ever admitted that to him before. Or said anything like it.
“You don’t know that,” he said, not sure why he was arguing. “You’re pretty tough.”
Mati touched his cheek. “As are you.”
David sighed. He’d always thought so, but over the last couple years, he’d gotten used to hiding how fragile he felt a lot of the time.
He knew the truth.
Reese pressed his nose against the back of David’s neck and drew in a deep breath. The scent of David’s shampoo, the lingering traces of his cologne, and a hint of Mati’s hand cream, all mixed beneath the covers, trapped with their warm bodies. It was centering. Reassuring. Almost enough to make what Reese was about to say less terrifying.
“I hardly left the house for a year. And barely went any farther than that for a long time. Trust me when I say you’re plenty tough.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and waited. It wasn’t anything Mati didn’t already know. Hell, she’d lived through a good chunk of it with him. Had gone with him on some of his first trips off Nova Scotia—she and Hodges his unwitting security blanket.
Nerves fluttered, his stomach clenching with them when David rolled over to face him. Mati peered at Reese over David’s shoulder, tucked in close behind him.
She looked pleased, which surprised Reese.
“I, umm…” David began, pausing to lick his lips. “I knew that?”
Reese sighed. “Chance?”
“Kieran. But don’t be mad at him. He told me at the same time he promised to bury my body where no one would find it if I hurt you.”
Reese was touched. He made a mental note to do the Morrison thing and hug Kieran the next time he saw him.
“My point,” Reese continued, “is that we all have things that set us back. Getting run off the road was not something I handled well. Having everyone think it was because I was drunk made it worse.”
His breath caught when David kissed him. “What was that for?”
“I wanted to.”
Something tight and sweet welled up in Reese’s chest. An unbearable affection. He kissed David back.
Mati looked at David from over his shoulder. “You’re not fucked up.”
“I am,” David said flatly.
“Okay,” Reese amended. “You’re not any more fucked up than most of us.”
David almost smiled. “That might be true.”
“And you’re incredibly tough,” Mati added.
David made a face as if he didn’t believe that.
Reese couldn’t understand how David didn’t see it. It wasn’t about how big David was, or how capable with a gun or in a fight. It was about how much he still cared. How hard he worked to protect people he barely knew, let alone the lengths he went to once hedidknow them.
“You’re getting through it,” Mati said.
