“I don’t know what happened. I was in the street and this asshole reporter guy followed Lucy and I out and Viktor was there, and he helped us, and I… I just… I kissed him. It was just a small peck, like a thank you for helping us. The reporter had my arm and my adrenaline was rushing. I thought—”
“You kissed him?” The pain in Ryan’s eyes is apparent, gut wrenching, poignant, unrelenting. “So he’s right, you want him.”
“Want him?What? I told you last night I had weird sexual attraction, but that’s where it ends. And what do you mean,he’s right?”
Ryan lets out a heavy sigh. “He came by here today. He said he wanted you. He said you wanted him.”
I’m furious, though I can’t rationalize why. I’ve spent all day wondering what his weight would feel like on top of me, what his breath would feel like on my core, how a self-titledbad mantouches a woman. My clit thumps at the thought.
I really need to get ahold of myself.
“I want you too,” I say, tears streaming down my face. I wipe them away quickly. “It’s not fair. None of this is. I’m not making sense. This is exactly why you should stay away from me. I’m a mess.”
“Maybe this whole thing is just sexual,” Ryan says, wiping away my tears. “Maybe if you do it, you’ll feel free of it.”
He wrings his hand around the back of his neck and returns his gaze to me. “He’s on his way back. I think he’s going to ask you to…” Ryan’s face turns dark red. “I think he’s going to ask you to see us both… at the same time.”
My clit pulses, stronger this time. The immediate thought of being sandwiched between two big men doesn’t sound terribly awful. In fact, it sounds pretty great. Then again, that could just be my hormones talking. It’s been forever since I’ve been intimate.
“No,” I finally say, though I’m not sure how convincingly. “That’s crazy. It’s crazy to even think about. I love you. I can’t hold you up with my bullshit.” I stare up at the ceiling then back to Ryan again.
His dark eyes are focused and searching. “Is it weird that a part of me is glad he was there for you today? Who knows what would’ve happened if that reporter got you and Lucy alone?” He bends into my neck and kisses my collarbone slowly. “I’ll take you however I can get you, Everleigh. If that means I share, then I share.” His breath is warm sending a line of tingles down my back.Why is he being so understanding?
I open my mouth in revolt again, but the doorbell rings, stopping my thoughts in their tracks.
“You’re in control tonight,” Ryan says, kissing my cheek. “I’ll love you whatever you choose.” He holds his gaze on me for a second longer before heading toward the door.
I’m in control?No one should put me in control of anything, especially not this. I’m a free-falling vampire, suddenly desperate for the dick of every man in sight.
Viktor steps inside. He’s dressed differently, not in the normal suit and tie that he’s usually wearing. Tonight, he’s wearing dark blue jeans and a crisp white t-shirt, every muscle in his chest clinging to the fabric as he looks toward me.
Damn it!My clit swells and I’m sure my eyes sparkle as I look toward him. It’s an involuntary response. One that I can’t very well control, despite how hard I’m trying.
His gaze is on me, intense, and hot. I try to look away, but I’m drawn back immediately, guilt in my stomach as I glance toward Ryan. I have to get out of this or I’m going to be sprawled out on the bed begging them both to touch me. Meanwhile, my rational brain will be locked away somewhere, hollering obscenities at me to stop.
“You need to leave, Viktor.” I say, my voice shaking. “Ryan told me why you’re here and I—”
“Hear me out,” he groans, his voice deep and ragged like he’s been gargling rocks. He steps inside and closes the door behind him. He looks wrong in my space. Too big, too expensive, too dangerous. Finally, I see his tattoos closer. I’d forgotten to look at the bar, and this afternoon he was wearing his suit jacket again which covered most of them. There’s a flower of some kind on his hand and what looks to be some kind of skull above that with birds flying out of the eyes.Is that weird?Maybe that’s weird. I want to keep studying him, but I’m prompted out of my head by Viktor’s deep voice.
“Ryan and I talked today,” he says. “We both want you to be happy.”
I nod, my arms crossed in front of me as I fidget with the string on the side of my dress.
“I know what you’re going to say and it’s insane. First, because I barely know you. Second, because I care deeply for Ryan.”
“I know you’ve only taken Philosophy for one day, but you’ll soon learn thata world where it is safe to love, is a world where it is safe to live.Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio, said that. What does it mean to you?”
I roll my eyes. “This isn’t a classroom. We’re—”
“What does it mean, though, when you hear it?”
My lips purse and my arms cross over my chest. “I don’t know. I guess it means that living is about loving, and if love isn’t everywhere, then nothing can ever be safe.”
“You’re right,” he grins, another genuine smile. I like those. He should use them more.
“That doesn’t help me, though. I don’t think—”
He steps toward me, his giant hand moving up toward the side of my face. Fuck, I’m melting. I’m literally fucking melting. And I can’t, not here, not now. “I don’t love you, Viktor. I don’t even lik—”
