He poured her the slightest amount, just a line of amber at the base of a glass. “Go easy. See if you like it first.”
Lucy sipped and even that felt sharp on her lips, even hotter on her tongue. A trail of flames shot down her throat. But once it reached her belly, oh, that felt nice. As if a little furnace warmed her from the inside out. “It’s like liquid fire.”
James laughed. “It’s been called that.” From the chair he’d taken near hers, he held the bottle out. “More?”
“Not yet.”
She wanted to be clearheaded.
Pressing a hand to her throat, she willed her heart to stop rushing in her ears so she could do this properly.
“I think I’ve found a solution that will fix things.” Lucy locked her gaze with James’s and ignored the fact that he looked skeptical. She expected that. He was a man who’d been duped. Trusting must be hard for him. Perhaps he didn’t even trust himself.
But she trusted herself and knew with certainty what she wanted. Finally.
“Go on. I’m listening.”
They were too far apart. Lucy imagined how James might do it if the situation were reversed. She reached for him, and he came to her, concern bending his brows.
He knelt by her chair, took her hands in his. “What is it? You can tell me.”
“Marry me.”
James blinked, and then again. He looked away and then back at her. His mouth fell open, but no words came out.
The man was thunderstruck, and Lucy wasn’t surprised.
This was shocking and unexpected. But it was also perfect.
“Don’t you see?” She ran her fingers along his hand, up to his wrist, because touching him comforted her. “If we marry, it fixes everything. Aunt Cassandra can keep Invermere. You can pay back Mr. Beck. And we can be together as I believe we both wish to be.” She gulped, because this was one of the variables she couldn’t be entirely sure of. “If you feel as I do, of course.”
“Lucy...”
“My dowry is fifteen thousand pounds. A great deal, I know. Or at least, I know it now. Honestly, I’m not supposed to know the amount at all, but you see, I handle my mother’s correspondence—”
“I would never use you that way. You deserve a hell of a lot more than that.” He kept one hand in hers and reached up to cup her nape, shooting delicious ribbons of warmth down her back. “Don’t you understand whatyouare worth? To hell with your dowry.”
She kissed him. Gripping the open edges of his shirt front, she pulled him close and seamed herlips with his, then she drew back to lick along his bottom lip as he’d taught her. He opened to her, kissing her with the same fierce longing.
Their desire was the same.
“Don’tyousee?” she said to him when they were both breathless and he’d pulled the pins from her hair. “You wouldn’t be marrying me for my money but because of this.” Laying a palm to his chest, she felt the wild beat of his heart. “What’s between us. The way we are together.”
He leaned in, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, prepared for more kisses, but he pressed his forehead to hers. “Sweet, stubborn girl. I would still be using your money to serve myself. Tofix, as you say, my own failures. No.”
“James.” Lucy pulled back, one hand still on his shoulder, the other tracing the line of his shirt front. “Do you not understand that I care for you so much that I’d give you those funds freely if they were mine to give? And, in essence, they are, because my parents have given me the choice to follow my heart in marriage.”
Bending his head, he took her hand and kissed it, and then her palm and knuckles. “Lucy. You would not wish to marry me if you didn’t feel a need to help me. And I do adore your desire to help others.” He smiled at her. “I wouldn’t have you any other way. But you should be free to choose a man you don’t feel the need to save. I won’t let you do that.”
“It’s not just that. You must know that I feel—”
“I have feelings for you too, but that’s precisely why I can’t be the man who marries you for your money.”
Lucy swallowed against how much it hurt that he was refusing her. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, that she’d want him no matter the circumstances. But she could see the determination in his eyes. The belief that he was being noble by refusing her plan. She’d anticipated this reaction, and when she fought her way through emotion, logic told her that all was not lost.
He was an honorable man, and she understood why he saw marriage to her as more advantageous to him than to her. Scratch that. He was afoolish, honorable man.
But she still had her contingency plan, and that was the one she was the most certain of. In truth, the one that, right now, tonight, she wanted most.
