She raised an eyebrow. “Your place?”
“I’d rather not go to a public place with you. Rest assured I’m not jumping your bones. I’ll text you my address. Be there at seven.” Now he had to tell himself not to jump her bones.
***
“Come again? You’re gonna see him in half an hour?” Janie said.
Elena rubbed her hands together. Damn it, even her palms were clammy. In the middle of her friend’s living room, she paced and almost made a hole in the beige carpet. The myriad of family pictures and displays of awards of her daughter’s soccer skills crowded the place, and a pang of jealousy swept over Elena.
“I came to give you the skirt.” She forced a smile. “You asked me what I was doing—”
Janie sipped her tea and pointed at the skirt, nicely laid over the plaid couch. “Thanks. You could have waited until tomorrow.”
She brought her hands together in a soundless clap. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m nervous.”
“Why? Honey, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. For goodness’ sake you don’t even need to go to his place.”
I want to.Ever since he had told her to go over, the idea was like the shot of tequila into the margarita mix. She couldn’t resist him. Sure, she could, but…a strange sensation had taken over her body. Anticipation. Ripples of delayed pleasure. Shit. “We need to talk about some work stuff I can’t mention now. And he told me he wasn’t going to touch me or anything.”
“Are you sure? Because this red dress might give him some mixed messages.”
Heat spread across her cheeks. Was Janie right about her knee-length dress? There wasn’t a low V-cut, or a high-slit, or anything like that, but it outlined her body, and the rich texture was like an intimate caress over her flesh.
“Doesn’t my coat count?” She pointed at her black coat, tossed over the sofa.
Janie rolled her eyes. “Of course. Because Devon Wilder most likely can’t afford a heater and you will need to keep your coat on.”
Elena plopped down on the couch, shoulders sagging against the throw pillows. If even someone who didn’t know the whole story like Janie had read her like a fast food menu, what would Devon think? And why the hell did that matter so much? “Is it so obvious that I’m an idiot who doesn’t know what to do?”
“What’s going on?”
“I don’t know. A part of me wants to give in and sleep with him, but then I know I just can’t. It’s complicated, but it’s been a while. Even if all those policies and stuff weren’t in place… I don’t know how to get started. Yet I can’t stop thinking about it.” Wanting it.
“How long?”
“Three years.”
Janie leaned forward. “There’s a good reason for that, isn’t there? Someone with your looks and personality doesn’t just stop dating for that long.”
“I don’t like to talk about it. Listen, I’ve done therapy. I guess in theory I’m good to go, but when it comes to the practical side…”
“And why do you think an affair with Devon would be beneficial? He’s not into monogamy, and you have the white picket fence dream written all over your forehead with a neon Sharpie.”
She touched her forehead, then shook her head. What was it with the white picket fence? She would much prefer black wrought iron. “That’s exactly why. I married someone I thought I loved. My whole life I’ve always followed the rules. I’d like to get another chance at love some day, but without the ghost of my dead sexuality lurking. Without the sexual issue stigma. Does that make sense?”
Janie shot her a knowing glance, and for a moment she wondered if her friend knew exactly what she was talking about. The sound of footfalls on the carpet yanked them from female-bonding land. A lovely little girl, probably seven or eight, held on to her stuffed bunny.
“I came to give you a goodnight kiss, Mommy,” she said, and her eyes, brown like her mother’s, focused on Elena.
Elena waved. “Hi. You are prettier in person than on the pictures on your mommy’s desk.”
Demi smiled. “Thanks,” she said, and gave her mother a tight hug.
Janie whispered something in Greek to her, and after kissing her forehead, said, “Off you go. Make sure Daddy helps you pick clothes for tomorrow.”
“Done. Goodnight,” she said, and waved at Elena.
A sigh she didn’t realize she held flew from her lips when the little girl was out of sight. Damn it. She wanted all that too, one day. How would she be able to focus on getting the right guy and marrying him, if the sex part still felt like a rock in her shoe? “She’s adorable. You’re lucky.”
