“You have? How? By not telling me you knew I was pregnant? By trying to trap me into a loveless marriage? How’s that a change?”
Was she right? They couldn’t discuss the future of their child without hurt feelings? “I could say the same thing. You never told me about the baby. You assumed that was your problem alone and didn’t share it with me, even though we were finally getting along.”
She lifted her chin. Resentment flickered in her eyes, her facial expression closing like heavy doors of a dungeon. “I needed to figure thingsout.”
“Exactly. Why couldn’t we do it together?” he asked, shoving his hand into his hair, desperate to find some common sense. “I thought these past months brought us closer, but I was wrong. You don’t care for me. You don’t care for my opinions. All you’re probably thinking about is how this pregnancy will inconvenience you, and the rest be damned,” he finished, accusation dripping from his voice.
She stepped back, her eyes glossy. Her lips trembled, hinting his words hurt her beyond measure. His gut clenched. Shit. What she’d done, what she’d said hurt him too. “Right now I just want you out of my life. Leave, Jack,” she said, the vein on her neck pulsing.
Lola swallowed.She blinked back the tears with all her strength. Daddy had lied to her. Her mother had lied to her. Hell, even Jack lied too. Who cared why he’d done it? It didn’t change the fact she didn’t get to where she was on herown.
Even I lied, when I omitted the pregnancy from Jack. I’m a failure. Glancing down, she glided her hand over her stomach. What kind of role model would she be? Jack’s painful words rang inside her like the bell of an old church. All you think about is how this pregnancy will inconvenience you, and the rest be damned.
She sniffed. Earlier that night, her world had collided not once, but twice. Her guests weren’t at fault, so she returned to the common areas and continued to mingle and talk until the last one left. Now the clock read well past midnight, and there’d been no sign of Jack after she told him to go. At last he’d followed her lead, though it didn’t make her feel the least bit victorious.
A knock on her door spiked her pulse.
She straightened her shoulders. What she really wanted to do was to curl into a fetal position and cover herself with a blanket. What else did she and Jack have to talk about now? The baby, of course. She knew he would be the best dad in the world, but she couldn’t marry him if he truly didn’t love her. When she’d asked him earlier, he not once mentioned his love for her. At best he’d said they finally got along.
Did she really need to be in another relationship filled with resentment? Margo always treated Daddy in a way that barely hid her own pain. And now she knew why. Then her first attempt at marriage had gone terribly wrong.
“Bunny, let me in. It’s me,” her mothersaid.
Lola shook her head as if her mother could hear her. Pepper whimpered, and went to the door, tail wagging. He scratched the wood and stood on his twopaws.
Fine.She scooted out of the bed, and taking a breath deeper than the Pacific Ocean, she got to her feet and reached for the door. Before she opened it, she stared at the door handle for an instant. Hesitation had her pulling her hand back, unsure and anxious about the consequences of letting her motherin.
“I won’t leave until I talk toyou.”
She opened the door. Her mother looked… different. Her eyes were reddish, and the makeup around her eyes, slightly smeared. Even though it was late, she still had on the same dress as earlier. “What?”
“I need you to hear me out,” Margo said, storming into the room even though she hadn’t been invited to joinher.
Shrugging, Lola closed the door. Sadness had smothered most of her energy. Or maybe that was just the pregnancypart.
“I’m sorry for everything,” her mothersaid.
Lola swallowed hard. Words failed her. Never had she heard Margo admit guilt so quickly—and genuinely. Usually it came with strings or a backhanded compliment. Lola bit her lower lip. Her mother’s confession didn’t redeem her mistake.
“I saw Jack go before the party ended. Did you two fight?” Margo fiddled with her necklace.
Lola plopped on the bed. “Yes.”
Margo sat next to her. “Don’t be like me, dear. You love him, right?”
Why deny the obvious? Lola cleared her throat. “Yes.”
“Then don’t let pride get in the way. Fight for him, and fight forlove.”
Sighing, Lola massaged her temple and wished she found a solution that didn’t involve a loveless marriage. “It’s complicated. I’m pregnant. Due to our past, I don’t want him to be with me just because of thebaby.”
“You really think he’d stay just because of thebaby?”
Lola surged to her feet, restless. “Why not? He’s done it before. He was heartbroken when I had a miscarriage two years ago. Tonight, he didn’t tell me he loved me. Not even when he asked me to marry him. Or I guess to stay married.”
Margo fixed her hair, then gave out a sarcastic laugh. “Do you really think a man like Jack would let you transform this place if he didn’t love you? Are you blind?”
“I bugged him a lot so he’d let me,” Lola said, deciding not to mention the deal she’d struck with Jack. Giving her mother more information wouldn’t change things. Right? A cold chill slid down her spine.
Margo shot her a look of amusement. “Honey… Jack isn’t a man to let himself be bugged unless he wants to.” She squared her shoulders, and leaned forward. Her brows furrowed. “Listen. I was in the wrong with your father. It may not seem like it from whatever snippets you have of our marriage, but I loved him. Instead of letting myself get lost in emotions, I was scared. I used every excuse as a shield and a condition. And that drove me away fromhim.”
“I… I’m sorry,” Lola said, even though the reason why was different than what her mother could interpret. The words resonated through her like her body was the inside of adrum.
I loved him. I was scared. Used every excuse as a shield and a condition. Could it be possible she managed to make the same mistakes as Margo?
“No. I am. I’m too old not to realize I sabotaged myself and my marriage. And you are too young to follow in those shallow footsteps.” She gave Lola a sad smile. “Besides, you’re far smarter.”
Lola pondered. She had lost Jack before. Was she going to lose him again? And what would be the price of going to him and revealing how she really felt abouthim?
