And Han was upset. Oh, he tried to brush it off and pretend that he was unconcerned, but Iliana knew him better than she knew herself. If only he’d manifested as a wizard years ago when most of his cohort had, he’d be much easier in his skin.
And Iliana would know where she stood with him.
Surely he’d manifest as a wizard soon. It wasn’tunheard offor a student, especially the males, to remain uncategorized into their early twenties, but it was highly unusual. And Han was not the kind of person who liked standing out, at least not because he was odd.
Han disappeared into the tower and she sent a last wish for good luck that he’d get an answer. The waiting was so hard on him. Her cheek burned where he’d kissed it and her heart swelled with a keen longing that should’ve numbed over time and yet grew only sharper. There was a time, up until a year ago, when she’d nurtured the possibility that Han could be one day truly hers. Until she’d received the news that she’d been certified as a familiar.
Since then it had been a daily struggle—against her family, the academy faculty, and against her own weakening resolve—to remain at Convocation Academy. Had her younger self realized what her nineteen-year-old self now knew, she’d have been less diligent in her studies. As it was, she’d completed almost all of the required coursework, including most of the courses in Advanced Training for Familiars. In fact, she’d been second only to Lady Veronica Elal, who’d been a year ahead of Iliana, and the star of Convocation Academy before her crashing fall from grace.
Everyone had been certain Lady Veronica—Nic, to her friends, and Iliana had become sort of a friend—would manifest as a wizard, including Nic. Rumor had it that a number of faculty and staff had lost a considerable amount on losing bets that day, one that Iliana remembered more vividly than her own certification as a familiar. She’d never aspired to being wizard. Well, she’dwantedto be a wizard—everyone did—but she never felt like she would be. The final verdict came as no surprise, not like it had with Nic.
Iliana had seen Nic that day, her dusky skin blanched with shock, her striking green eyes glassy as cheap wine bottles, her head nevertheless held high as she moved through the crowded corridors, apparently oblivious to the smirks and whispers. So many students had been viciously pleased with Veronica Elal’s abrupt demotion from Convocation Academy golden girl and heir apparent at powerful House Elal to lowly familiar.
Not Iliana. She’d always admired Nic. Some of the wizards and the wizard-presumptives treated familiars as beneath notice—until they needed to use them. Not Nic. She had always been friendly and generous to Iliana, even after Iliana was certified as a familiar. Iliana didn’t think that was only because she’d been close friends with Alise, Nic’s little sister.
So, when Nic had joined the classes in Advanced Training for Familiars to finish out her education, Iliana had tried to return the favor of being human to her. A lot of the other students hadn’t been. The wizards had cut Nic from their social circles with breathtaking ruthlessness, behaving with exceptional cruelty to the former star, as if Nic had somehow deceived them. And the other familiars… well, they hadn’t been any kinder.
Nic had remained politely removed from it all, her focus leagues away. She’d also graduated as soon as possible afterward, commencing her Betrothal Trials just a few months ago.
Iliana shuddered at the thought. She couldn’t bear the prospect of the Betrothal Trials for herself. She didn’t have Nic’s spine, her sheer determination to triumph despite being relegated to the life of a familiar. Iliana didn’t think she could bear to be sequestered for as long as a year, visited by a different wizard suitor each month until one impregnated her and won the right to make her his bonded familiar. Iliana wasn’t exactly surprised Nic had chosen that route. Her MP scores were brilliantly high, so she’d have an exceptional field of High House wizards vying for her. No one so impressive would try for Iliana.
And that was if she could bear for anyone to touch her but Han. She couldn’t even imagine it, since her heart had belonged to him for years.
Naturally she’d never told Han how she felt. He didn’t need more pressure. Given everything he was dealing with, Han didn’t need his best friend pining after him in hopeless and unrequited love. It wasn’t as if he could force himself to unlocking the mysterious faculty that allowed a wizard to access the magic a familiar could only accumulate. The Convocation had a long history of experimentation on familiars, attempting to force that ability. It had resulted in a lot of dead or insane familiars. Fortunately, Convocation law protected them now. It would be lovely to think the Convocation protected familiars out of recognition of their basic rights as human beings, but the Convocation set policies for one reason only: profit. Familiars were far too valuable to be squandered.
Regardless, even as a moderately talented familiar, Iliana was destined for a life of service—to an individual wizard or to the Convocation in some capacity. While it was a lovely fantasy to imagine Han as a wizard, who would then choose her for his familiar, it was only that, a fantasy. Han wouldn’t have much more say in choosing his familiar than Iliana would in choosing her wizard. And, even if his family did let him choose, and if the Convocation approved Iliana as a match, Han might not choose her at all, an even more potentially heartbreaking outcome.
So she’d never acted on her feelings for him, had never asked him if he thought of her as more than a friend. That kiss on her cheek… it still tingled, but her skin couldn’t determine if that had been a kiss of friendly affection or more.
And it didn’t bear contemplating, especially since she had class to attend.
Iliana made itthrough Wizard–Familiar Dynamics without thinking about Han too much. She actually liked the class, which focused on ways that familiars could support their wizard masters. The topics of study ranged from the finer points of how magic wielding affected a wizard’s health and wellbeing—and what a familiar should do to assist—to general education in household management. The familiars jokingly referred to it as The Care and Feeding of Wizards 101, though sometimes that was so accurate that it wasn’t funny.
Today’s lesson had focused on types of massage that would both relax a wizard stressed from spellcasting and also restore their native magical reserves. Of course, a wizard could always access their bonded familiar’s magic to restore their reserves or work any enchantments they wish, provided the wizard didn’t carelessly drain their familiar.
The subtext, however, caught Iliana’s interest. The professor teaching the class was himself a familiar, once bonded to a wizard who’d died. None of the late wizard’s heirs had been interested in taking on the orphaned familiar, so he’d ended up teaching at Convocation Academy. A rather enviable improvement in fortune—and relative freedom—but also a path dependent on several strokes of good luck, so not one anyone could reasonably aspire to. Iliana liked Professor Tracy quite well and absorbed what he carefully didn’t say in so many words: that a wise familiar used other methods to rejuvenate their wizard, thus avoiding the painful and exhausting prospect of being drained.
It gave her food for thought and she thanked Professor Tracy on the way out. As she did, he asked her to stay a moment. Once the classroom had cleared out of other students, Professor Tracy leaned a hip against his desk. “I heard Han was summoned to the Testing Tower—any news yet?”
Iliana shook her head, unsurprised that Tracy would ask her, but a bit taken aback at his interest. “No, but I won’t see him until later.”
Her professor nodded thoughtfully. “I feel I should warn you that even if Han manifests as a wizard, he might not be able to choose you as his familiar.”
Face heating, she ducked her head. “I know that. I’m not an idiot.”
Professor Tracy clucked his tongue. “I didn’t mean to imply you are. What I meant to say is… Your friendship with Han has been noted.”
“That’s what we are.” Forgetting to be embarrassed in her indignation, she lifted her head. “We are friends. We’ve never crossed any lines.”
“We know that,” Professor Tracy said gently. “I’m sure you realize the thought-seekers have monitored the situation. I’m asking that you take care of yourself, Iliana. We familiars have very little power. Don’t do anything to increase your vulnerability, that’s all I’m saying.”
She nodded mutely, not trusting herself to reply.
He nodded back. “I believe you should be heading toward your next class.”
“Yes, Professor,” she said meekly, tamping down the urge to point out that he’d been the one to keep her in the first place. Once again she turned to go and, once again, he called after her.
“The Convocation ways and laws are very old, Iliana,” he said, waving a hand at the ancient stone building of the academy around them. “Going against those foundational beliefs will only lead to sorrow.”
