“Did you know she was coming?” My father gets straight to the point.
“Of course not. When I left Seattle, she was still very much hospitalised. That’s all they could tell me.”
“Then how is your ex-wife here, and why more importantly?”
I take the glass of bourbon he hands me and down it in one go. He refills it. “Take it easy, or your sister is driving you home.”
“Your guess is as good as mine. And she’s behaving like the last couple of years didn’t happen. I don’t know what is scarier, hating me, and not wanting me near her, or this farce.”
“You need me to make some calls?”
I nod. I don’t have the contacts my father does or the energy to find out what the hell is going on.
“I’ll do that in the morning; for now, let’s drink up so we can at least sit through dinner.” I cling my glass to his.
The woman sittingnext to me talks animatedly and laughs out loud at my family’s jokes. She talks about the past, well, the good parts at least. I nod and chip in as much as I can. Marcy glares at me across the table. I am so fucking late, so I text Shelby to tell her that I won’t be over tonight. She doesn’t reply, and we haven’t even spoken about what happened yesterday.
“So, Katie, where are you staying while you’re in town,” my father asks.
“With Ember, of course,” she casually states, as if it is the most natural thing in the world. I choke on my drink, and my mother comes over to tap my back.
“That might not be a good idea,” I manage.
“It’s a bad idea,” Marcy chimes in.
“Whatever do you mean? I have to stay with my husband.”
“Husband?” we all say in unison.
“Oh, you lot are a toot.” She laughs.
“Renovations. My house is under construction, so I’m living on Marcy’s couch for a while,” I tell Katie.
“Oh, well, then I’ll have to book into a motel in town.”
“Why don’t you stay in the cottage?” My mother offers. “You’d be much more comfortable there.” What my mother isn’t saying is she can keep an eye on her with all the security cameras.
“Thank you, that is really kind of you. Is that okay with you, Emb?”
“Yes, perfect. I hate to be the one to break up this happy reunion, but I need to get up pretty early for work. Marce, are we driving together?”
“Yes, we are.” Marcy responds quickly.
We say our goodbyes to our parents, and I give Katie an awkward hug. It’s strange how circumstances, distance, and time can turn the person you thought you’d love for the rest of your life into a complete stranger. That is what Katherine is to me now, a stranger.
I walk into the house,and I’m met with the heavy kind of silence that makes you walk right back out again. I flick on a switch in the entrance hall and look around the place. It’s as empty as I am hollow. A three-seater leather couch and flat-screen television the only furniture in the living room. The rest are boxes. Strolling into the kitchen, I pull out a bottle of whiskey. There’s hardly any food here, I don’t bother with shopping and shit like that, but there is booze.
It’s when I take my first sip that I realise that I haven’t needed this kind of escape in a while, not when I’m with Shelby. She’s all the high I seek. The more time I spend with her, the easier it is to feel like a normal man, not a broken and shattered soul with no heart left. I bring the bottle to my lips again, chugging down at least a double. It burns my tongue and my throat on its way down. I’m waiting for the numbness, that feeling of freedom I always sought from Katherine.
Seeing her again felt like falling through thin ice. My family and I used to love to skate on the pond when it snowed. I was the daring one. Marcy always followed the rules. One day I went too far, slid over some thin ice, and plummeted into the dark, icy depths. For a few minutes, I couldn’t see, speak, or even react. I could see my father above the ice layer, but all I wanted to do was sink deeper. I was numb. Dad saved me, I had to spend the night in hospital, but I survived.
Katherine, on the other hand, is something I will never survive. She will take and destroy and leave me riven. That is the way she was and how she will always be. I fell in love with her for all the right reasons. She was smart, beautiful, and had big dreams. She made me want to dream bigger too. But, that changed early on in our marriage, she became controlling, dissatisfied, and no matter how hard I tried to reach her, I couldn’t. My eyes are heavy, really heavy, but I pick up the phone and dial the number of the only woman I want to talk to right now.
“Hey.” Her sleep-filled voice makes me hard instantly. My reaction to her is crazy. “I missed you.” Disappointment laces her voice.
“There were some things I needed to sort out at my folk’s place.”
“You okay?”
