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“Of course.” I kiss her forehead and turn out the light by her bed. “I’m going to need to run a quick errand, okay? But Mrs. Harris is going to come stay for a bit, so if you wake up and need anything, she’ll be here. Okay?”

She gives me that worried frown again. “Promise?”

“Promise, promise.” My body’s tight, knowing I can never truly guarantee these things.

My father hasn’t tried to make contact since I threatened him, but he could still be out there. Lurking. A bus could mow me down. Who knows what else? But if there’s breath left in my body, I’ll always come back to my little girl.

“Maybe tomorrow you and Uncle Mike can both tuck me in?”

I’d like that. “We’ll see, baby.” After giving her a quick kiss on the forehead, I quietly sneak out of the room.

It’s not like I can tell her I want Mike back here as much as she does. Maybe more. The last few nights have been brutal, waking up without him. The daytimes are even worse. Since before Ella was born, I haven’t needed to know what life was like without him.

Now that I do?

Devastating doesn’t describe it.

Accidents happen, Daddy.

As I thank Mrs. Harris for coming over and slip out the door, something hits me.

All these years, it’s burned me up that Mike still blamed me for Billie’s death. And sure, I blamed myself too. But my little old soul has a point. Accidents happen. I’ve been blaming myself for something over which I had no control. I know I have. Maybe it’s worth trying to forgive myself.

And Mike, who’s done so much for us. Sacrificed for us.

Maybe we can forgive each other, too.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Dean

“Thank you for agreeing to meet.”

I’m in a glossy wine bar downtown, meeting with my client, Tim. We haven’t seen each other since he asked me out. We’ve never met before outside of his condo. This entire situation feels stiff and strange. I’m just glad the place isn’t too crowded, so we can hear each other at least.

“It sounded important.” Which is why I came. That, and Tim’s been a client so long he’s almost a friend. But don’t like being away from Ella. I’m trying not to let my leg jiggle to give my nerves away. Wishing Mike was here to help keep me still.

Tim looks at me for a minute before answering. “I called Brennan to schedule our next appointment.”

“Oh.” I look down at my wineglass, out of which I’ve taken zero sips. Not sure what to say right now.

“Look, if you don’t want to, uh, see me again, I understand. I just wanted to apologize. Asking you for more than you’re willing to give obviously made you uncomfortable, and I shouldn’t have⁠—”

“You should have,” I blurt out. It’s the truth, even if the truth makes me squirm in this high-backed chair. “You’re a good guy. I like you.” I’m tempted to glance over my shoulder. Still expecting to see Mike everywhere. Hoping, even, that he’ll punish me for this hint of betrayal. “If you’d asked me at a different point in my life…I might have even said yes.”

Tim isn’t having any trouble downing his own wine. He takes a healthy gulp of the red he ordered, looking strained. “Thanks. It’s, uh, it’s been good. To feel something for someone again. After everything.”

Honestly, that’s nice to hear. “I’m glad.”

He leans back in his chair. “Yeah, so I have you to thank. Even if that’s all it ever is.”

Glad to know I did a good thing. Warmth blooms in my chest. Not the kind I feel when I’m with Mike, but I’ll take it. “Much appreciated.”

“How’s Ella liking the new school?”

I can’t help the glow of pride that flares in my chest. “It’s great. Can’t thank you enough for helping us out.”

“And what if I asked you for a date as a thank-you?” Whatever my face looks like, it makes him laugh. “No, I’m kidding. Really.” He tilts his head. “Besides, my sister’s on the admission board and she said you brought your fiancé to the interview. I hadn’t realized you were engaged.”