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His whole body was clammy, his mouth dry. Water seemed to rush in his ears …

‘The flood raced in, in a torrent like I’ve never seen. He – Rab – hadn’t had time to make sure his harness was secure and he was washed away. They never found his body.’

‘This is horrible. So horrible,’ Katie said. ‘All while you were trying to save someone.’

‘Yeah. But you went back in the train and risked your life for that family. I read the reports. I caused someone to lose their life.’

‘That’s not true. You were in an impossible position and you saved the two others,’ she insisted.

‘Yes, although I find it very hard to see it like that. Impossible. The inquiry cleared me but I didn’t clear myself. I have had to find a way to live with those feelings of guilt and the endless questions, the what-ifs. It’s why I left the reservists and came to live at the Island House.’

‘And your family? Did they encourage you to come up here for a new life?’ Katie asked.

‘They were obviously grateful I was alive. Mum kept telling me to be thankful. She’d had a hell of a scare but she didn’t want to hear the gory details. Can’t say I blame her. My father couldn’t understand why I didn’t simply “pull myself together” and my brother was too wrapped up in making his fortune. He wanted me to join him in his business and “direct my energies” into making money. I told him I wasn’t cut out for anything so ruthless, so I took over this place.’

‘I suspected something bad had happened to bring you up here, beautiful though it is,’ Katie said. ‘You said you had a girlfriend – Rowan?’

Arlo focused on the lake again. ‘She couldn’t handle the me who came back. She was sympathetic at first but when the – PTSD – went on and on, she left. We hadn’t been together long. We’d met shortly after she’d split with her fiancé. I should have realised she was on the rebound. Within a few months of us splitting, she went back and married him.’

Katie’s gasp was barely audible. ‘I’m so sorry.’

He turned back to her, loving her for her empathy and kindness and sheer willingness to listen to all his shit. ‘Now, I have told you everything I didn’t want to. I absolutely could not stand it if you pitied me. I am alive – like my mother says – I should be grateful and I am. I really am. But like you, I can never forget that others aren’t here to enjoy this Christmas.’

‘I don’t pity you but I do care about you—’ Katie stopped abruptly, as if she had more to say but had thought better of it.

‘I knew this was a bad idea. Now I have undoubtedly ruined your Christmas. I’ll take Ned back when he’s ready. Thank you for the book. I’m honoured – genuinely.’

‘Please wait. Don’t go now …’

But he marched off, thinking that he’d revealed way more than he ever intended and with the panicky urge to get out of the situation as fast as he could.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

So far, the rest of Boxing Day morning had passed without any more incidents. Then again, it wasn’t even ten o’clock. Katie had guessed that Arlo had experienced some traumatic events but his story still shocked her. Then, when she’d thought she’d broken through a barrier with him, he’d shut her out.

She had sensed his panic as he walked away and hoped he could start the engine because he was clearly desperate to get off the island now.

Wanda and Katie finished washing up and tidying the aftermath of the previous day’s excesses. While Katie stacked their breakfast things in the dishwasher and switched it on, a shaft of sunlight poured in through the window. It gave her an idea.

‘Do you feel like a walk?’ she asked Wanda.

Her aunt broke into a sunny smile. ‘That sounds lovely. We’ll have to wrap up warm though. It looks bitter out there.’

‘It is bright though and it’ll do us both good,’ Katie said, feeling that she’d neglected her aunt with all her issues with Ned and Arlo. ‘And we can have some time together for a catch-up.’

Rime coated the lawn and iced the withered beech leaves. Overnight rain had added more snow to the fell slopes. The brightness had dimmed and the tops were now a mystery, hidden under cloud. There could be unicorns or giants living on them for all anyone knew.

They took the path that led away from the house towards the old boathouse on the opposite side of the island to the house. Shrieks of laughter and splashes drew them to the shore where half a dozen orange floats and matching hats bobbed in the water.

Katie smiled. ‘Oh look, it’s the wild swimmers again.’

Wanda glanced at them with an anxious expression. ‘They must be stark raving mad,’ she huffed.

Mad wasn’t how Katie would have described the shrieks of laughter coming from the shallow water off the boathouse.

Wanda tugged Katie’s arm. ‘Let’s go and see how Arlo’s doing with the launch.’

‘I – I don’t think he’d want us hovering over him when he’s trying to fix it.’