Page 78

“Is that really how you feel?” Iris’ eyes sparkled with unshed tears, and she blinked rapidly to clear them. “I don’t deserve that, after how I’ve treated you lately. I’ve been a monster.”

“Nah.” Gabriel unfurled his paper napkin with a grandiose flourish and draped it over his lap. “I’d compare your recent behavior to that of a teething baby dragon. Old enough to bite, but incapable of breathing fire.”

“Please don’t tell me dragons are real, too,” Iris moaned, flipping over her menu.

“You never know,” said Gabriel impishly.

Their waiter, a local boy named Oliver who also worked part time at the bookstore, sidled over to take their order. Once he’d moved away, Iris leaned across the table, looking determined.

“So, when are you planning on telling Blair about your involvement in what happened to him?”

Gabriel was taken aback by the abrupt change in subject. He had of course been horrified when Iris had told him what she’d learned at Blair’s family home. The memory of what had occurred in that abandoned church in the fall and winter of 1815 had plagued Gabriel for centuries, even when he hadn’t known the identities of the so-called weapons Obedience had abused. Learning that one of her victims was a man he now considered a friend, realizing that he had held open the door to the witch who had settled a cloak of darkness over the rest of Blair’s life, who had been responsible for the death of his sister, pained Gabriel beyond explanation.

Oliver unloaded a steaming pot of water and two thick, stumpy white mugs, along with a square container of teabags and a little pitcher of milk. Gabriel took his time steeping his drink, the tea bag string wrapped around his pointer finger like floss as he swirled it through the steaming water.

What Iris had to understand was that revealing the truth to Blair would require significant forethought. That kind of information was sure to wound, and Gabriel had inflicted enough harm on the poor man already.

His crime had been considerably more far-reaching than simply allowing Obedience inside the walls of his sanctuary; he had allowed her to stay, even after learning what she’d meant by the term ‘weapons.’ He’d been an abysmal wretch of a coward. But what good would come from telling Blair? What problem would that solve? It might make Blair angry enough to leave them—and he couldn’t hurt Iris that way.

Gabriel flexed his jaw, his hands curling over the napkin in his lap. “When the time is right.”

“When exactly will that be?” Her tone was sharper than he expected, plucky as the highest string on her mandolin.

“Blair has been rather preoccupied lately,” Gabriel reminded her, hiding behind his mug as he took a long, scalding sip. “Do you really think it would be wise to drop this on him right now?”

Iris shrugged, but a flicker of uncertainty crossed her face.

Gabriel knew she couldn’t deny the truth in his words. Now that he’d finally secured a storefront for his apothecary, Blair had been spending much of his time in town getting ready for opening day. Gabriel had been nothing short of thrilled when he’d come home from work the previous Monday to find that several of Blair’s beakers, measuring cups, oils, and his battered copy of Materia Medica, had all been removed, giving Gabriel back his pristine kitchen at last.

Blair had also struck up a rather unexpected friendship with his new investor, Anna, whom he’d met while selling his wares at the craft fair. Like him, Anna also happened to be an accomplished violinist. Iris and Gabriel were due to meet her a week from Saturday, when Gabriel had requested the afternoon off so the three of them could put the finishing touches on Blair’s shop prior to opening weekend.

Then there was the fact that Blair had recently lost his most precious possession: Lucy’s signet ring. He spent nearly all of his free time searching the house for it, aided by Iris. Gabriel, who remained convinced that Blair had lost it somewhere in town—probably in his own shop—had given up looking after the first couple of hours.

Gabriel ate his lunch slowly, Iris’ silence making him feel as though an entire lemon had been squeezed into his tea. She kept her eyes on her plate, picking at her turkey sandwich so listlessly, you’d have thought it was cold Spam.

Perhaps the kind of experimental partnership Gabriel had with Iris had always been destined to fail. Maybe being in such a small minority of the population as someone who was both asexual and aromantic, compounded by the isolation that came with being an immortal warlock, doomed him to a life of loneliness and estrangement.

Possibly it had been self-serving to imagine that after his dishonorable past, he would ever come close to deserving the kind of peace a life with Iris offered him. Maybe the only true form of love was the one he had never wanted. He didn’t really believe that, yet the possibility clung to him like sap from a decaying tree.

He couldn’t shake the fear that he would spend the rest of his unending days reaching for the sun when he was destined for darkness.

30

Gabriel was vaguely aware that a wedding was supposed to be a joyful event.

He supposed it hadn’t been so bad at the start. The ceremony was one of the shortest he'd ever had to sit through, and the outdoor venue Audrey and Evette had chosen to speak their vows—a sweeping snow-dusted lawn overlooking a vast mountain range—had made the experience quite pain-free.

Until the reception, when Gabriel found himself seated in a stuffy banquet hall that reeked of stale wine and fishy salmon, glaring unseeingly at the dance floor.

“Hey, how’re you doing?”

He glanced up from the cold drink in his hand to find that Audrey had settled into the empty chair next to him. Her long, billowing white gown fanned out over her lap, spilling across her shoes and onto the gleaming floor. She smiled at him, a touch of sympathy around her eyes.

“I’m well. Congratulations, Audrey.”

“Thank you.” Her gaze moved to the center of the dance floor, where Evette was dancing with Audrey’s father-in-law. Both wore identical wide smiles, lost in the revelry of the day. Gabriel was certain he’d never possessed as much energy as any one of the couples out there, and that included Iris and Blair. How Iris had managed to drag Blair out there in the first place, he’d never know.

“I’m sorry things have been rough for you guys lately,” Audrey said, leaning across the ivory tablecloth.