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There was no anger in his expression. That would have been easier to understand. Instead, I saw the focused attention of someone already adjusting his plans.

I didn't stay to find out what those plans were.

I ran.

I knew where Kaelen had gone before I reached the doors. I crossed the courtyard and cut through the physic garden barefoot, the frozen grass biting into my injured feet while I gathered the ruined silk in both fists to keep from tripping over it.

The bond beneath my breastbone pulled me toward him.

I followed it to the Glasshouse.

I shoved open the rusted door and stepped into warm, damp air thick with the scent of roses.

Kaelen stood at the far end where I had found him during the storm. Both hands were braced against the old wooden bench among his mother's rose bushes, his head lowered and his shoulders rising hard with every breath.

Moonlight came through the broken panes above him.

He heard me enter.

His head lifted, but he didn't turn around.

"Go back, Hale," he said hoarsely. "Please. Go back."

"No."

"Wren."

"It didn't work."

"I know it didn't work."

The answer came out louder than he intended.

Then his voice dropped.

"Because I failed."

"You chose not to sever me."

"Don't make it sound brave." He finally turned toward me. His eyes were still gold. "I went up there intending to do it. I told myself that if I loved you enough, I would cut the bond and give you whatever time that bought you. One night, one hour, anything." He drew an uneven breath. "Then you opened the bond." One fist pressed against his chest. "I felt you choose me. I felt you give yourself to me while I was standing there holding the knife that was supposed to cut you out of my life."

"Kaelen—"

"I couldn't do it." His voice broke. "Death would have been easier." There was no hesitation. "I would die for you. I would put that knife through my own heart before I used it to make myself stop wanting you."

He took a step toward me. "I want you. I crave you. I have wanted you every day since the first time I smelled you across that Hall, and I am tired of pretending it is something I can remove from myself."

He swallowed hard.

"The selfish part wasn't loving you. It was knowing that Severing might buy you time and still being unable to do it. When I reached your name, all I could think about was what would happen afterward. I wouldn't feel you anymore. I wouldn't know where you were. I wouldn't know when you were reaching for me."

His next breath was unsteady.

"I can survive my father. I can survive Fenhall. I can survive dying for you. I could not stand there and choose a life where you were gone."

Some of the anger inside me loosened, but not all of it. "You should have trusted me enough to let me choose with you."

"I… Maybe. I…"