Page 5

She looks at me, annoyance written across her features. And then she picks up a shoe and throws it at me.

“Hey!” I yell, ducking just in time. I stand back up slowly, crossing my arms over my chest and giving her an unimpressed look.

She falters, face twisting in shock. “Y-you can see me?”

“Yeah, I can see you. And that was rude.”

“I just…” Her voice goes all high and squeaky, bottom lip wobbling. She steps back, hands knotting together nervously at her chest. It’s probably a bit bewildering, being perceived after being invisible for so long.

I drop the stern teacher act, crouching to her eye level. Delphine settles beside me, her hand finding my shoulder.

“My name is Bellamy,” I offer in a temporary truce. “What’s yours?”

I don’t blame the distrustful look in her eyes or the way she chews on her cheek. I imagine she’s been stuck here for some time, and the circumstances of her death don’t bear thinking about.

“Anabelle. Are you a boy?” The tilt of her head as she looks me up and down is almost endearing.

Delphine snorts. I shuck her hand off my shoulder and scowl at her, which at least makes the little girl laugh shyly.

I take a moment to look over her clothing—rough-spun dress ending near her ankle, poorly made shoes. Not from this time.

“I am a boy, yes.” Oh, the joys of androgyny. “Do you have any siblings, Anabelle?”

Her expression fractures. “I-I had two sisters and a brother. They…I don’t know where they went.”

Delphine’s hand squeezing my shoulder again pulls my attention. “Are you sure we cannot keep her?”

“You know we can’t. It’s not fair to her.”

This is the part that hurts. Not for them, but for me. I never had anyone teach me what I was, what I could do. I ended up stumbling blindly into my power, making mistakes, learning as I went.

I can help her now, but it still sends my magic reserves circling down the drain.

“Would you like to see them again?” It’s always easier with children. Easier to convince to cross over, lambs led willingly by the gold-eyed shepherd. I like to think of myself that way, a shepherd helping them cross over to where they should be.

I have no idea what happens when they get there, but I hope with my whole heart that it’s pain-free and peaceful.

When she nods, I let my eyes shutter and begin my visualization. As corny as it sounds, I envision a doorway filled with warm light, the smell of fresh-baked bread, the sound of children laughing and dogs baying in the distance. I open my palms, letting my magic flow where it needs to go, the folds between here and there.

“What…what is that place?”

“That’s where your family is. They’re waiting for you, Anabelle.”

I’m met with a moment of heavy silence before my heart begins to break.

“Will you come with me?” she asks timidly, not knowing how much those words tear me up inside.

“I can’t, sweetheart. I’m sorry, I have to stay here.”

I keep my eyes firmly shut, concentrating hard on keeping that channel open for her to cross. I hear whispers of encouragement from Delphine, and then cool fingers brush across my cheek. A shudder ripples through my entire body as the girl passes through me, the pain sharp and immediate in my chest.

I gasp and collapse forward onto my hands and knees, rocking back and forth, breathing through the sensation and willing my heartbeat to settle down.

There’s no telling how much a crossing will affect me until it’s happened. Some are quick, painless. Some are so agonizing they put me in bed for hours. This one is somewhere in the middle, but I manage to get back on my feet after a few minutes.

“Perhaps you should get some rest now, Bellamy,” Delphine says quietly. I sense her edge of sulkiness—she’s not happy with me for banishing a potential friend. I know deep down she understands that it would weigh on my conscience too much to leave a soul suffering and trapped.

Flicking the excess energy from my fingers, I shuffle into my new bedroom and rifle through my suitcase for the outfit I want to wear tomorrow. Finding my cute velour jewelry box, I set it neatly on the side table.